Singing Through Pain
by xXxNtKxXx
Summary: Clary's mother has died. She tries to get through it all, with the help of her brother and his singing, but then she moves to England. A place she doesn't know. Then there's school. Slightly crazy, but seems to make everything seem kind of normal. But then things go bad. AU. Contains bad language. Nothing else. Although people will kiss. It's Clace. What can I say?
1. Introduction

**_Hi. So basically, this is an idea that just came out of a song I was listening to_**** Lullaby Ft. Tori Kelly, by Professor Green._Yes, I'm in love with it. It's everything I've ever felt. So this story was just randomly inspired. These chapters will probably be pretty short, but I will try to make them long, I promise!_**

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><p>Hi. I'm Clarissa Adele Morgenstern, but please, it's just Clary (in other words, bitches and bastards, if you dare call me anything other than Clary, I will murder you). I'm sadly very short, have pale skin, bright red hair and emerald eyes. I take after my mother, and I like art and comics like Manga.<p>

I have a brother, named Jonathon Christopher Morgenstern. He looks just like my father, Valentine Morgenstern, with his high cheekbones, set jaw, pale skin and white-blonde hair; but Jon's features are more delicate and not as sharp. He's lucky enough to be tall, as well. He's some kind of chick magnet, and practically dates a different girl every week. Also, he has a _seriously_ big head sometimes.

We clearly don't look alike at all, except our eyes, (and our hands, but who the hell looks at people's hands?) seeing as we have the same eyes as my mother, Jocelyn Morgenstern. Jon and I have similar personalities, though.  
>We're both hard headed, rebels, pretty smart, very strong, shouldn't be underestimated and we understand each other. I've never loved anyone except my brother and my mother.<p>

My father is a seriously boring, rich, horrible lawyer, and wants my brother to follow his profession. But the thing is that my brother hates Valentine's guts. He tries not to, but he does. I'm honestly not surprised. Valentine whipped Jon as a child. He deserves to be hated by his children. Also, Jon wants to sing. I think he should, because his voice is amazing. But my father thinks it isn't a _manly job_. He says it's a job for wimps. But Jon has never been a wimp.

My mother... Well, this is where my life gets complicated.  
>She was a painter, but then she just disappeared without a trail. She was gone for eight months, but then her body turned up in some forest. I don't actually know what happened, and to be honest, I really don't want to know.<p>

When Valentine first told me, I didn't believe him. _Lies_, I'd said. But he had this sort of defeated look on his face, and I knew. _I knew_ he wasn't lying. He wouldn't lie about her. He loved my mom.  
>At first I didn't feel anything. I stayed in my room for the rest of the day; I didn't want to come out. But when I woke up the next day, it all hit me.<p>

_My mother was dead._

And then the tears started streaming. I couldn't stop. I didn't eat or anything. The only reason I got to sleep was Jon. He'd comfort me; no words, just comfort.  
>And this is where we started singing. It was a song we both knew. Lullaby. And it fit us so well.<p>

_All the time I have laid in your love  
>When your love kept me safe through the night<br>All the time I was sure you were mine  
>And before time demands our goodbye<br>Can you sing me a last lullaby?_

_It's been a while since I last dreamt  
>Barely remember what it's like to dream<br>Finding it hard to get to sleep, too stressed  
>And there ain't anyone to sing a lullaby to me<br>Pretend shit doesn't get to me  
>And I suffer in silence when I'm hurting<br>A man's problems are his own  
>And it's my burden<br>Tossing and turning, trying to get to sleep  
>But I find it hard to switch off when my mind's working<br>I ponder on things I shouldn't ponder on  
>Off the rails, my train of thought's wandering<br>Sick of pretending to be so happy  
>All the while my anxiety's away at me<br>My skin crawling, I look up to the sky  
>And it falls, the walls close in and it's<br>As if all the good in my life disappears  
>In an instant, that thing is just so distant<br>So seeing the ones who I love, the ones who love me  
>But I don't wanna tell em how I feel in case they judge me<br>It's just me, wish I could let somebody in  
>But I ain't ever been too trusting<em>

I've never thought my voice was any good, but I'd always found comfort in Jon's. And that's how I went to sleep at night. But the next day was school.  
>Oh, you know, boring old that occupies half a girl's life?<p>

Yeah, that. Just checking you're not an alien. If you are, school is a place where we spend six hours a day, Bored out of our brains whilst someone talks about some pointless topic that will never come up in our lives. Ever. Take English for example. When will I ever have to explain the connotations of the sky to someone? It's pure suck basically.  
>OMG and Valentine would never let me skip school. Of course.<p>

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><p>So, I got out of my bed (finally, wow, I never thought I could), went to take a shower and see if I could make myself look slightly <em>not<em> dead. Yeah, that never happened. I threw on a black hoodie and jeans, and walked out of my room. Jon looked no better than I did.

His hair was flat, and he looked dead too. We seemed to have dressed the same, with black hoodies and jeans. Wow, we clearly both didn't want to be noticed.

"Hi," I said.  
>"Hey," was his reply. We even sounded dead.<p>

I walked down the stairs, Jon following me. Jon pulled out some croissants, telling me to eat one.  
>"I'm not hungry."<br>"Take it."  
>"No."<br>"I will shove this down your throat."  
>I reluctantly took the stupid croissant from him.<br>"I hate you," I grumbled. He gave a half smile.  
>"Love you too."<p>

_Such sibling love._

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><p><strong><em>Ok! Should I continue this? Or should I completely scrap it because I'm such a crappy writer? Please review and tell me what you think!<em>**


	2. School Sucks

_**Hello! I just watched **_**Wolf blood,**_**and I'm dying because it was so good.**_

_**I'm so proud of myself. I have 2 reviews, 2 Story Favourites and 2 story followers! WOOOOOO! I'm so tired though. Its 21:23 and I don't know if I want to be writing right now. But I also have nothing better to do.**_

_**Disclaimer (I forgot for the last chapter): I do not own the mortal Instruments or any of the lyrics. If I did, why the hell would I be on FanFiction?**_

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><p>After we'd walked out of the house and got in the car, Jon turned his radio on, and I pulled out my phone. <em>Oh fuck,<em>was my initial response. I had fifty five messages from Simon and izzy, my two best friends. I opened Simon's messages first.

_Is everything ok? Isabelle's having a heart attack because she thinks you're dead_

_Please don't be dead._

Isabelle's messages were a little crazier.

_Want to come to my place?_

_Fine, ignore me then!_

_Clary, have you died?_

_Clary_

_Clary_

_Clary_

_Clary_

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_Clary_

_Ok, you are totally dead._

I groaned inwardly. "Izzy is going to murder me." Jon turned down the radio.  
>"Why?"He asked.<br>"I haven't messaged her in two days," I told him.  
>"Izzy probably had a shopping dilemma and I don't think I want to go to school," I said.<br>"You'll live,"  
>I scoffed. "Gee, thanks (!)"<br>"I think I'm going to stay with you today. I can't deal with my assholes of friends, "he said quietly.  
>"Your fault for being friend with them."<br>He looked at me, and dayum, I can't exactly say no to his pout. He reminds me of a cute little boy who's just been caught stealing cookies.  
>"Ok, fine! But don't you dare take the piss out of Simon, and don't hit on Isabelle."<p>

"Now, why would I ever do that?" He said, feigning innocence.

_Idiot. _

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><p><em>let me just tell you - school sucks. <em>

We were walking into school, with our hoods up, seeing as we didn't want to be noticed. And it's kind of hard if you don't have your hood down and you have bright red hair, or white-blonde hair that stands out from black really bad. So I managed to get to lockers without anybody noticing me and Jon. I pulled out some books, with Jon standing by me. But my hopes of going unnoticed failed. Isabelle's distinct clicking of heels could be heard from a mile away. _Oh crap._

"_Where the hell have you been_?!" she yelled. _Aaaaand everybody's staring. "_You didn't reply to any of my texts!" _So awkward. _"I thought you were dead! You could have at least said, _oh hi Izzy, I'm totally not dead! _Are you avoiding me or something?" I finally opened my mouth to say something, but Jon decided to but in.

"What would you do if your mother died Isabelle?" he said quietly. "Would you go and have a party? Or would you mourn? Because our mother is dead. Don't you think we should be allowed to have some time over it? Don't you think we should be allowed to mourn in peace?" Jon's voice sounded dead, but he had that look where he knew he couldn't do anything about it.

"Oh Clary…" Isabelle sighed. "Come here." She wrapped her arms around me.

"Thanks Izzy," I whispered. It was a nice hug, until I heard a familiar voice.

"Hey, Clary. Um, hi Jonathon." He looked at me Izzy and me, then at mine and Jon's clothing. "Uh, what did I miss?" he questioned while scratching his head.

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><p>English is the worst subject ever. I have to work with Sebastian Verlac, who's nice, but doesn't do any work. I'm depressed and trying to get the work done, while he makes stupid, pointless small talk. Isabelle thinks he has a crush on me. I don't actually know what to do about that, so I've decided to ignore that piece of information. I hardly acknowledge Sebastian's constant droning about some form of crap (if I'm quite honest, he probably <em>is<em> talking crap) and I keep writing random words that come out of my mind.

"Oh, for fucks sake Sebastian, _will you shut up_!"I practically yelled. "You aren't getting any work done, and it's seriously making me want to kick the shit out of you!"

Well, it made him close his mouth. He stammered an apology to me, and then started _pretending _to read some papers. I sighed. _Why is the world full of such retards?_

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><p>I finally got out of English, and Jon came to me.<p>

"I have a detention," Jonathon told me.

"How the hell do you get a detention within two hours? What did you do?" I said exasperatedly.

"I fell asleep in my maths class," he groaned. "And the stupid-ass teacher didn't think that our mother's death was a good enough reason to be sat at the back of the class asleep. How is that not good enough? What's wrong with everyone?" he whined.

"It wasn't exactly your fault I guess," I said to make him keep quiet.

"But-"I cut him off.

"Go to your next lesson Jon. I can't be bothered dealing with you right now. I'll see you at lunch ok?" he grumbled some response, and then went to go talk to Isabelle's brother, Alec.

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><p>I <em>was<em> walking to my locker, but Kaylie stopped me. She could've been really pretty, with her sky blue eyes and blonde hair, but she smothered he face in makeup and she wore the littlest clothing ever. Oh yeah, and she has the bitchiest attitude ever. I hate her. I'm pretty sure she pays people to sleep with her.

She pushed me out of the way, and then fakes gasped. _Oh here it comes. _

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" she cried. Kaylie knocked my hood back, then grimaced. "It's just midget." _I really can't deal with this._ "Hey what's with all the black clothing? You haven't decided to go all Goth on me, have you? Oh, you even look dead!" she gave a girly, high pitched giggle, and her group started sniggering as well. Tears stung the back of my eyes. Those other girls could have a life, but noooo. They had to hang out with stupid Kaylie, and her stupid makeup and stupid clothes. I pity them, I really do.

"What's your problem," a voice sneered. "Don't you – oh I don't know – have lessons to go to other than picking on clary?" sometimes my brother appears at the best times.

"Well Mr. Hot, I'm pretty sure you could do better than this," she gestured to me "and why do you look so down? I'm sure I could help you," she gave a sickly smile. I swear Kaylie must have some sort of switch to flick from bitch to flirt. She makes me want to throw up.

"Firstly, what you're referring to as '_this_' happens to be my sister. Ugh, I would never date her. And secondly, I really don't want to be dating some flesh covered in makeup and trampy clothes." Kaylie spluttered indignantly. "Sorry, it's true," He clasped my hand, and pulled me away from bitch-face.

"Jon, where are we going?" I yelped, laughing.

"Definitely not going to lessons, that's for sure," he hollered. We went into one of the empty music rooms. He pulled out his phone, and played his music on shuffle.

And then he started singing.

_Bad news like a sucker punch, what do you say?  
>Air knocked out of my lungs want you to stay<br>When you hear something difficult don't back away  
>Some people say nothing, good ones engage<em>

Don't turn your back on me  
>Don't bury your head deep<br>Just cause you don't know what to say

Don't turn your back on me  
>Don't bury your head deep<br>Just cause you don't know what to say

It's true  
>That it kicks you in the teeth when you are least expecting<br>Bad news  
>Oh it beats you black and blue before you see it coming<p>

Bad news like a sucker punch moving your way  
>People fill the streets like nothing has changed<br>Clapped hands if you're lonely don't leave the same  
>Planes fly overhead like any old day<p>

Don't turn your back on me  
>Don't bury your head deep<br>Just cause you don't know what to say

Don't turn your back on me  
>Don't bury your head deep<br>Just cause you don't know what to say

It's true  
>That it kicks you in the teeth when you are least expecting<br>Bad news  
>Oh it beats you black and blue before you see it coming<p>

Maybe I just want some words of destruction  
>I feel like I'm being consumed<br>Maybe I'm expecting the perfect reaction  
>It's pulled me back<p>

It's true  
>That it kicks you in the teeth when you are least expecting<br>Bad news  
>Oh it beats you black and blue before you see it coming<p>

It's true  
>That it kicks you in the teeth when you are least expecting<br>Bad news  
>Oh it beats you black and blue before you see it coming<p>

"Thank you, thank you!" he shouted, as if talking to a crowd. "Come on, clary. We have to have some kind of fun. I've felt so depressed all day! Come on. Next song that plays or take your pick, you have to sing. "

"But _Jon, _I don't want to!" I whine. "I can't sing!"

"I'll sing the next song with you?" he gives me puppy dog eyes, and I swear he is manipulating my brain.

_Sleeplessly embracing  
>Butterflies and needles<br>Line my seamed-up join  
>Encased in case I need it<br>In my stomach, for my heart  
>Chain mail<em>

Hunger of the pine  
>Hunger of the pine<p>

Sleeplessly embracing  
>Yawn yearns into me<br>Plenty more tears in the sea  
>And so you finally use it<br>Bedding with me you see at night  
>Your heart wears knight armour<p>

Hunger of the pine  
>(I'm a female rebel...)<p>

Sleeplessly  
>Embracing<br>You

Realization grew on me  
>As quickly as it takes your hand<br>To warm the cool side of the pillow  
>I'm there for you, be there for me<br>I'll hum the song the soldiers sing  
>As they march outside our window<p>

Hunger of the pine

Sleeplessly  
>Embracing<br>You

Une immense espérance a traversé la terre  
>Une immense espérance a traversé ma peur<p>

Jon smiled

"beautiful."

And then the bell went for another class.

"Oh, shit, we better get out of here!" Jon shouted. I nodded in agreement. I felt like saying _yes, yes we should_. But I just ended up laughing as we ran out of the class.

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><p><em><strong>Wonderful, it is now 18:30. I'll probably update either tomorrow, or next week, because I'm going to different country on Thursday, and I don't actually know when I will be back.<strong>_


	3. Shocks - i hate them

_**Hello again. Thanks to that small amount of people who have reviewed, followed, and favourite my story. I'm really happy, because it's only been two days. I don't have a set date for updating, but I will try to tell you when my chapters would hopefully come up. I'm posting this on Sunday, so I will hopefully update by Wednesday.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own anything. **_

I am totally amazed that absolutely _no one _caught me and Jon running out of a music room, laughing our asses off. I mean, how did it just so happen, that nobody seemed to be in this specific section of the building? You'd think that Jon planned this or something...

_Or maybe he was just lucky._

Linnneeeeeee breeeeeeaaaaaakkk

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. My life will end in the last two minutes of this lesson. Why won't the clock move any faster? Tick tock. Tick tock. Tick tock. This is the clock to my life.

_I'm slowly drifting... Drifting away... Wave after wave... Wave after wave._

Ok basically I really think this is stupid. I don't know, my head hurts. Why won't they just let the bell go? _You will go now… move, you stupid clock! _ I'm trying to hypnotise a clock with my mind. That just goes to show how bored I am. I swear I will start counting sheep.  
>The bell goes. Hell yeah! I do a mental fist pump and run out of the class.<br>Jon usually takes me home, so I wait for him outside his class. And then I remember. He has a detention.

Jon's usually a pretty good student who can get teachers to do anything he wants, but today, he actually has a detention. Clearly he isn't all that lucky. How the hell do I get home? I simply refuse to walk for half an hour. Simon Izzy has to go home with her brother, so I can't go with her, it would be Awkward! Oh hell, I didn't want to call my dad, but there was clearly no other way.

"Uhh, hi dad. Jon has a detention, and I was wondering if you could pick me up?" I said, proud that I hadn't stuttered.  
>"Ok child."<br>Wow, no arguments? Just like that? Not why is Jon in detention? Ok.  
>"I guess I'll see you in a bit then," I replied awkwardly.<br>"Bye."

Liiiiineeeeeee breeeeaaaaaaak

Awkward, awkward, awkward. Awkward, awkward, awkward, awkward, awkward. (That looks like some demented bird squawking) Just one more time: awkward. Driving home with dad was awkward. He asked how school was, how I was feeling, and then there was an awkward silence - which was no surprise. Here's an example of our small talk.  
>"Why does your brother have a detention?"<br>"He fell asleep in math and then talked back to the teacher," I muttered.  
>"Oh."<br>End of conversation.

So, when we finally got home, what my father next said to me startled me.  
>"I have important information to tell you when Jon gets home," he told me.<br>"Uhh, can't you just tell me now?"I asked.  
>"It wouldn't be fair on Jon."<br>Of course it wouldn't be fair on Jon. Jon was his father's golden boy (Which I will never understand, since Jon seems to hate him.).  
>I go to my room, to do some homework while waiting for Jon, but I end up lying on my bed with music blasting through my headphones (no surprise there!).<p>

_And I told them:  
>Nah, you don't know me<br>Lightning above and a fire below me  
>You cannot catch me, cannot hold me<br>You cannot stop, much less control me  
>When it rains, it pours<br>When the floodgates open, brace your shores  
>That pressure don't care, it breaks your doors<br>Say it's all you can take, better take some more_

I abruptly stop singing as the front door slams closed. Jon's home. I hear footsteps near the staircase and assume its Jon, but I hear my father's voice.  
>"Clarissa!" He called.<br>I pulled my headphones off.  
>"What?" I yelled back.<br>"Come down!"  
>Ughhhhh, but my bed is so warm!<br>"Ok!"  
>Why does my mind betray me this way?<br>I drag myself up from my bed (insert amazing description of bed) and walk down the stairs. I stare at my father expectantly, waiting for him to talk.  
>"We are moving."<br>My mind didn't process this.  
>Jon said exactly what was on my mind.<br>"What?"  
>"We're moving house," he repeated. He can't be serious. Oh yeah, he's serious.<br>I bombard him with questions. "Where are we moving to? Is it a different country? Will I never see izzy and Simon again?" I'm so shocked. I think Jon has lost his ability to speak.  
>"We're moving to England."<br>He has got to be kidding! England? That so far away. Then again, it wouldn't be THAT bad. Britain has some really nice and sexy accents, tea and scones in the park. And really bad weather. Like rain. I love rain. So does Jon. We're so weird.  
>"Why?" Jon finally speaks.<br>"There are too many memories here. I want a fresh start."  
>Dad said we have a week to pack and say goodbye. Honestly, I can't believe he'd drop this kind of bombshell. It's so... Unexpected. I mean, sure, he's a bit unpredictable, but this? This gives a whole new meaning to it all.<p>

Jon walks upstairs, and I follow him up. We say a brief hi, before he disappears inside his room. I went back to my bed, and grabbed my phone. I decided to tell izzy first.

_Hey, izzy. Need to tell you something._

_**Need to tell you something too.**_

_**Actually, need to tell you a few things.**_

_Come to mine?_

_**Be there in 5. **_

I let my phone drop out of my hand on to the bed. I don't understand. How am I going to tell Simon? Why do we have to move away? Why can't my father cope like me and Jon? I get that there are some bad memories, but isn't moving a little extreme?  
>I lie on my bed and scowl at the wall, but I doubt it will solve my problems.<p>

_I don't know where you're going  
>But do you got room for one more troubled soul?<br>I don't know where I'm going  
>But I don't think I'm coming home and I said<br>I'll check in tomorrow if I don't wake up dead  
>This is the road to ruin<br>And we're starting at the end_


	4. Reactions And That Random Movie

_**Hello! How's your life? I'm sorry that **__**I'm updating ten years late... It was bonfire night, and**__**I **__**went to see fireworks. Then I got flipping ill. Then I had to revise for a science exam (I got and A) AND NOW IM REVISING FOR A FUCKING SPANISH EXAM! You see my dilemma? I'll update maybe once or twice a week if I can stop myself from procrastinating. And my school life.**_

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><p>When Izzy arrives, she doesn't look too great. Actually, she has no makeup on (not that she doesn't look great without makeup on, because we all know that she does), and she looks really tired.<p>

"I'm moving to England." There's a lump in my throat. I can't speak I bite my lip, waiting for her reaction. I half expect her to explode, but she smiles, and I feel a lot better. But how's that a good thing?

"Really? That's great! My brother Alec is moving to England so he can see Magnus more! He's going to stay with some cousins," she tells me. Izzy honestly looks excited, and I don't think she was faking. The lump in my throat dies down, and I feel like I can speak again.

"So you'll be able to visit?" I ask uncertainly.

"Totally!" she cries. Good, I'll be able to see Isabelle, but I still don't know about Simon.

"So what did _you_ want to tell _me?_" I questioned. Her smile dropped.

"I-erm, yeah. My parents… they're um, getting a divorce," she muttered. Wow. Oh my gosh, that's worse than me going to England! And I'm moving to England…

"Are you- are you okay?" I say slowly. She waves her hand nonchalantly.

"Definitely. I'm just pissed at my dad. He had no right to be such an ass. This is why Alec's moving to England. He doesn't want to deal with it. I wish I could go, but I have to stay here. With Max. He can't go. Mom says he's too young." She says.

"Oh crap! How _is _Max handling this kind of shit?" I can't believe I totally forgot about the youngest lightwood. He's only ten, but he was much more mature (sometimes he is such a cute child though). Although he _does _have an obsession with comic books. Not that I'm complaining. It usually means I have a second opinion on what manga I'm going to read when I go to _Forbidden Plane_t.

"I guess he's ok. He hasn't flipped shit like the rest of us, but he HAS avoided Dad at all costs." Like I said, He's the most mature Lightwood. Well, at least he seems to be dealing with it better than Isabelle and Alec. Izzy leaves soon after that. I check the time on my phone.

_5:16pm_

I decide to text Jon, even though he's in the other room (I'm a lazy ass, leave me alone), and ask if he wants to do something. I tell him that I want to eat ice cream and I don't want to leave the warmth of my (insert beautiful description of home) house.

**_I want to watch some sort of movie, some really, really kiddie movie._**

Of course he does. Jon will never grow up, no matter how hard he tries.

_Sure. Whatever._

**_Wonderful, Cars 2 is on in 2 mins. You gonna come down? _**

I throw on a jumper on top of my clothes, because I'm feeling so very cold and walk downstairs.

I see Jon flicking through channels in the sitting room, as I walk past towards the kitchen. I want to eat ice cream. I rummage through the freezer, and realise something. There's no ice cream.

Dayum. I really wanted ice cream but I pull out some cookies instead_. Note to self; go buy ice cream._ Ugh, my head hurts. I sit down next to Jon, as the start for every Disney movie starts. Ooooh, I've never seen that car before. Finn McMissile. He's totally British; He's a British spy. Oh my gosh, he's dead already! Oh no he isn't. He faked his death. Hey look, it's Mater.

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><p>After <em>Cars 2<em>, I go back upstairs to try and finish that pointless piece of homework. I don't even know why I'm doing it, because like I said, it's pointless. I put my earphones in, and listen to some music instead.

_I tried so hard  
>And got so far<br>But in the end  
>It doesn't even matter<br>I had to fall  
>To lose it all<br>But in the end  
>It doesn't even matter...<em>

Sleep overtook my body as I sat at my desk. My head slumped as I fell into dreams...

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><p><em>They were just floating, in black ink, beautiful swirls hanging in the air. It made me feel dizzy. My dreams somehow shifted and Jon came into view. His arm s was covered in the black ink, and so was his neck, some disappearing down his shirt.<br>Shadow hunter runes. They are shadow hunter runes; I heard a voice in my head say. That voice...  
><em>But then I woke up.

* * *

><p><em>Hey Simon. We need to talk <em>

A few minutes later, he replied.

_Yo. You aren't breaking up with me right? ;-) _

_No. _

_Well I'm busy with my band practice. Call me?_

_Fine. _

I call Simon. I'm actually kind of panicking about Simon's reaction; But Izzy didn't react at _all _the way I had expected.

"Hello?" I speak uncertainly.

"_Hey, how's life?_" He says. The phone line's slightly crackly. Must be bad reception.

"I don't know how to phrase this…"

"_Just spit it out Fray," _he claims (Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I took my mother's maiden name). Ugh, I can't do this…

"_Clary?"_

"ImmovingtoEngland." He probably didn't understand that. I said it so fast; it hardly registered in _my _head.

"_What?_"

"I'm moving to England." I say slower.

"England_? What the hell?_" he cries._ "You can't be serious?!" _

"Uhh, yeah, I am. My dad is actually crazy."

"_Most definitely," _He agrees. "_When are you moving? How long are you_

_Moving for?" _

"Um, I have to be packed in a week, we're leaving then, and I think I'm staying in England for… an indefinite amount of time." _More like forever, _I think to myself. He huffs. "I don't _know_, Simon. I think it'll be permanent," I tell him.

"_Will I even get to see you anymore?_" Simon says.

"I don't _know_. Ugh, it's such effort! I cannot do this right now." I complain. "Talk about something different."

Simon decided to ramble about gossip in school, all the rumours and shit. I wasn't really paying all that much attention, but he still managed to make me laugh.

"_Clary?" there's a shift in his tone. "I think- I think I like Isabelle._

"You're kidding."

"_No, I think I really like her," _I can practically see him shaking his head. Ok, so Simon likes Isabelle, Isabelle's parents are getting a divorce, I'm moving to England. Whoop de fucking doo. This has been timed so badly. Izzy needs me, Simon needs me, and I need them. How am I going to deal with this?

"ok, so you like Isabelle, and I'm not here to ship it. Damn," I say half-heartedly.

"_oh, my god," _He groans. "_why did I tell you this?" _ I laugh at his stupidity.

"Because I'm your best friend, and you love me," I say it like it's a fact, which obviously, it is. "ok, fine, because you have no experience with girls, especially girls like Izzy," I state.

"_why? Why is the world so cruel to me?" _he complains.

"hush, child." The conversation was a load of rubbish after that. So Simon reacted pretty well, too. I _totally _knew that they would react perfectly. Yeah…

* * *

><p><em>All that you desired, when you were a child<br>Was to be old, was to be old  
>Now that you are here, suddenly you fear<br>You've lost control (You've lost control)  
>Do you like the person you've become? Oh<em>

_Under the weight of living_  
><em>You're under the weight of living<em>  
><em>Under the weight of living<em>  
><em>You are under the weight of living<em>  
><em>The weight of living, the weight of living<em>

_It all crept up on you, in the night it got you_  
><em>And plagued your mind, it plagues your mind<em>  
><em>Every day that passes, faster than the last did<em>  
><em>And you'll be old soon, you'll be old<em>  
><em>Do you like the person you've become? Oh<em>

_Under the weight of living_  
><em>You're under the weight of living<em>  
><em>Under the weight of living<em>  
><em>You are under the weight of living<em>  
><em>The weight of living, the weight of living<em>

_(Tell yourself this is how it's going to be)_  
><em>(Tell yourself this is how it's going to be)<em>

_Oh, tell yourself this is how it's going to be._  
><em>Oh, tell yourself this is how it's going to be, oh.<em>

_Under the weight of living_  
><em>You're under the weight of living<em>  
><em>Under the weight of living<em>  
><em>You are under the weight of living<em>  
><em>The weight of living, the weight of living<em>  
><em>The weight of living, the weight of living<em>

Life is cruel sometimes.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Ok! I am really sorry about not updating, it's just my life doesn't give me time for stuff. It's a piss take. I'm not even going to try to set a day, but I will update before <strong>_**NEXT **_**Thursday. **_


	5. The Introduction To Aayla Evergreen

_**Ok, so hellooooo! I'm updating specially for MumiFaraz786, so Shout-Out to her! Potatoes rock! This is my OC, tell me if you like her or not, but please don't insult her. Also, I really don't know how to write Jace, so if anyone wants to help me there, please do!**_

* * *

><p>Hello. My name's Aayla Evergreen. I'm sixteen, in Yr 11, halfway through my GCSE's. I'm average height, but compared to most of my friends, I'm quite short. I have dark brown hair, and blue eyes. I look more like my father, and don't actually look at all like my mother.<p>

I have a sister, called Eleyna, and a brother called Luke. Eleyna looks like my mother, with her brown eyes and round face. She's 13, and has a seriously foul mouth. She's just started her GCSEs as well, in Yr 9. My brother Luke is in Yr 12, in 6th Form College. The secondary school that I go to also does college, so Luke attends the same school as me and Eleyna.

Luke looks like a boy version of me (practically the spitting image of my dad when HE was a boy) but his eyes are slightly darker than mine. He and I are the same in many ways, like getting pissed off easily, but the main one is blocking things out. We sometimes come off as emotionless, and my friends have a habit of calling me a psychopath, even though I hate pain. Although, I DO have a habit of stabbing boys when they flirt or say something stupid. Ehh, so I'm slightly aggressive. Trust me though, if they think I'M aggressive, then they clearly haven't met Luke (He could send one punch and break something).

Eleyna looks like my mother. She's just started her GCSE's, and she's picked Geography, Art, and Spanish. She really wants to go into Architecture, but seriously, it's as hard as medicine.

* * *

><p>For my GCSE's I picked Dance,<br>Spanish and Computer Science.  
>I've loved dancing since I was a child, seeing as I always dance with my sister. I have a habit of dancing when I'm tidying, and I'm playing music. Sometimes my brother will see me dancing, and just walk away slowly, muttering how he feels so awkward. He's an awkward kind of guy.<p>

* * *

><p>I like reading books. I like music, and my favourite bands are Bastille, And We Were Evergreen. It's kind of ironic, seeing as my second name is <em>Evergreen<em>.

_My very first acoustic guitar  
>My first love, dads vintage car<br>My stupid poems I threw away  
>And all of the drawings that I erased<br>And all the words I should of said  
>And some that I did and that I regret<br>And all the songs that stuck to my head when I was in class  
>When I was in bed, when I was young<em>

* * *

><p>I have two best friends, Magnus and Aline. They're both homosexual, so yeah. Magnus is very extravagant. He covers himself in glitter, but in school, he can't wear glitter, and practically dies every day. There isn't a day of school that Magnus doesn't complain about not being able to wear glitter. On dress-down Friday's, Magnus wears as much colour as humanely possible. He even spikes his hair. He has a boyfriend who lives in America, and apparently is moving here, to England. Magnus also constantly calls people biscuit or darling.<p>

Aline's more normal, but she's so stupid at times. She's slightly crazy, and has, an obsession with some boy band that I can't remember the name of. Every time she talks about this so-called band, I seem to zone out, and never hear what she has to say, and what the band is called. Aline also has a girlfriend called Helen, who has pixie ears.  
>Does anyone notice how my best friends both are in a relationship, and I'm not? It's really sad.<p>

In school, there are two boys. The Herondale boys. They practically date everything remotely pretty. And the thing is their both beautiful. One boy, Will, has black hair, blue eyes. He's Beautiful. The other boy, Jace, is gold. Literally, gold hair, gold tan, gold eyes. He's sexy as hell, but I don't see him as beautiful.  
>Magnus agrees with me. Aline thinks Jace is prettier.<br>Anyway, these boys are really arrogant, and Jace, practically annoys me with everything he says.  
>I like stabbing Jace when he pisses me off, or if he says something slightly dirty. Will is actually quite nice to me for some reason; I think it's to do with Magnus.<p>

For all those Americans out there. You won't believe it, but we have to wear a uniform to school. Eleyna and I wear trousers shirt, tie and blazer with the school logo. Luke is lucky. He gets to wear any suit he feels like. At least Luke and I get a dress-down Friday. We get to wear anything. Eleyna doesn't get to wear anything she wants (only yr 11 students and 6th form students), but she does get to replace one part of her uniform with some other clothing. She usually changes her trousers for some bright random coloured skinny jeans. She and I own so many different pairs of trousers. It's amazing.

I like stealing Luke's jackets; they're really nice to wear. There was the time I was wearing one of his jackets and he couldn't any of his jackets, so I asked if he wanted this one, and he practically tore it off of me.

So, my mum and dad are both lawyers, very boring, I know. I honestly think it's a stupid profession. It's not like they care about my opinion, anyway.

I don't ever want to be in a relationship, I mean why would you want to walk down the street holding someone's clammy, sweaty hand? Eww, it's just gross. I mean, couples are really cute, but then I just ugh, no. yeah, I really don't want to be in a relationship.

* * *

><p><em>And these streets they are so cold,<em>  
><em>I've been freezing here for days.<em>  
><em>I've been lying for your company,<em>  
><em>Like the Sun you've cast a-stray.<em>

_Well it's only in these bones,_  
><em>there's no feeling in this face.<em>  
><em>If you'll look into my eyes, my dear,<em>  
><em>there's no hope for saving grace.<em>

_Is it lonely where you are tonight?_  
><em>Is it lonely, for you?<em>

_So every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>  
><em>(I'm walking with a stranger chasing<em>  
><em>shadows in my room).<em>

_Well every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>  
><em>(I'm holding onto questions I don't<em>  
><em>know the answers to).<em>

_And now hold onto me,_  
><em>if you love me;<em>  
><em>do you love me?<em>  
><em>'Cause every night,<em>  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>

_So we wander on our own,_  
><em>Chasing night and seize the day.<em>  
><em>There's no time for insecurity,<em>  
><em>in the life you create.<em>

_So I thought you,_  
><em>wouldn't have me any other way.<em>  
><em>But that didn't seem to be a reason,<em>  
><em>you walked out.<em>  
><em>Out of everything we had,<em>  
><em>and now I find myself alone.<em>

_So every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>  
><em>(I'm walking with a stranger chasing<em>  
><em>shadows in my room).<em>

_Well every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>  
><em>(I'm holding onto questions I don't<em>  
><em>know the answers to).<em>

_And now hold onto me,_  
><em>if you love me;<em>  
><em>do you love me?<em>  
><em>'Cause every night,<em>  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>

_So every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>

_'Cause every night,_  
><em>I'll hold onto you,<em>  
><em>Hold onto you.<em>

_And now hold onto me,_  
><em>if you love me;<em>  
><em>do you love me?<em>

_'Cause every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>  
><em>(Shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon).<em>

_'Cause every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>  
><em>(Shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon).<em>

_'Cause every night,_  
><em>I'll shout at the Moon,<em>  
><em>Shout at the Moon.<em>

* * *

><p><em><strong>Please review! I need Feedback! Also, to anyone who watches YouTube, go watch nothing Much To Do. It's amazing. <strong>_


	6. I'm Eleyna

_**Hello, everybody. I have just had a Spanish exam, and I'm hoping that I get a good grade. Eeeeks. I'm also going to a Marvel Marathon, like, who says no to that? Oh yeah, just something I need to say. Please don't hate against my story. This is like, my first real story. Don't be absolutely horrible in your reviews. Just constructive criticism please. **_

_**TO MAGNUSSWAG: your reviews were horrible. I was really offended when I read it. If you don't like my story, don't read it. Go write your own, so I can criticise it like hell. You clearly don't even have your own user. The first comment you put, I was like, ok, I can deal with that, but really? Singing Through Pain. It's going to have lyrics. Then there was your second thing. If you hated it that much, next time, just don't say anything. I was really unhappy, and all my friends were encouraging me to have a lot of inappropriate words and have a massive rant, but I felt that that was just mean. And then I just remembered your comment. To be quite honest, I'm pretty calm, because I haven't swore in the slightest.**_

_**Sorry to everyone else who had to read that, but the asshole didn't have a user for me to PM him. Real piss take. Please review. J**_

Hi, my name is Eleyna Evergreen, I'm 13 years old and right now I'm sat in General Studies listening to some guy drone on about how drugs are harmful (don't do drugs kids) while my life slowly slips away. It appears I have some time to kill, so I'll tell you about myself in this wasted hour of my boring, boring life.

So, I have a sister called Aayla and a brother called Luke, and a mum and dad. My brother and sister get all the love, because they are beautiful (I just look like my mum). I have an unstable relationship with my mum, and my dad? Meh, he's just my bank pretty much. Although he does buy me chocolate sometimes.  
>I don't really talk to Luke that much, but I dance with my sister. She doesn't like the dancing she's doing for GCSE's, which I find totally stupid, since she picked it. Aayla says that dancing is doing what you want, feeling the rhythm. In school, it's just a load of punching and jumping and sidestepping. Which I repeat, is stupid.<p>

I like listening to music, and, well, doing pretty much nothing whatsoever.  
>My music taste consists of pretty much anything. It ranges from scream to classic. Uhh, I prefer singing to dancing.<br>Wow, my life is really boring. Especially when I tell someone else.

I have a habit if wearing black tops or dark blue and bright coloured skinny jeans, because I love them with all my heart. I'm going to marry my jeans. Ok, not REALLY. But it would be funny just to see the reaction of my parents. _So, my trousers have proposed to me..._ _I said yes_. Hehe... Oh my gosh, I can just see their faces. I'm sure my friend Mina would approve.  
>She's my Partner in Crime, and practically my only friend. We seem to think in the same way, but that's what they say, isn't it? <em>Great minds think alike...<em>Yeaaaaah, totally.

From my gossip feed (namely, Mina), I know that my school apparently has some new kids. But, I don't know whether it's true or not, because half the time, Mina's gossip is _NOT, I repeat, NOT_ reliable. So, it's probably a load of bullshit. Excuse my foul mouth. I try to control it, but something always slips out. _Not like I could control it._

New kids. Hmm. maybe they're from another country. These new kids are going to either really popular, or really lonely.

I'm just going to start talking about my school life, because it sounds _way _more interesting than my actual life.

You know, once I sat in one of the school corridors, and I set up a Hobo Children Authority Organisation. No one donated, but the teachers on that corridor kept looking at us funny, and it was one hell of a laugh. Like seriously, who sits in a corridor, and asks for donations in a hat. Some people actually did put some paper in, so when I next wore my hat, I took it off and paper was sat in my hair. I was just like, _what the fuck_? Slightly demented, but yeah.

I once had a detention with this supply teacher, because I was talking to mina through the whole of English, and then we got ourselves a ten minute detention. We literally couldn't look at each other's faces, because we were trying not to laugh so hard. We still ended up running out the class laughing our asses off.

Most of my teachers think I'm a really nice student, like my maths teacher. I stabbed this seriously annoying guy who was saying highly inappropriate things to a lady such as me. My teacher completely overlooked this, and said he would have done something worse. Some people say I take off after Aayla, because of her habit of stabbing boys as well. Well, it's not like as if I got the idea from her when she came home saying she had a detention because she bruised someone's shoulder. It was hilarious.

There are two teachers who don't like me. My science teacher and my art teacher; they both seem to ignore me a lot. Science is a piss takes because that teacher is always pissed at the world, and my art teacher is just stupid. Take my mood board for example. It's a fucking mood board. You express your feelings and make a collage out of pictures. What does she do? She takes out half the pictures and arranges it into straight fucking lines. I mean seriously, what the hell? MOOD BOARD. Do the words mean nothing to her? Ugh.

Then there's my Spanish teacher, who thinks I can't do Spanish because I never talk in her lesson or seem to participate whatsoever in her lessons. She was shocked when she saw how well my accent was. Yeah, I was pretty proud of that.

After all my amazingness, there's always some form of flaw or bullshit. In my life, there's quite a lot of bullshit. I used to get bullied a lot in year 7 and pretty much didn't exist in primary school. And then there's this girl, she just fucking follows me around like a fucking lost puppy, and just won't go away. She's really annoying, and nobody likes her. I don't even know her name, because everyone seems to have nick=named her dick. She is a fucking dick. Her hair is so greasy, and has dandruff and all sorts of crap in it, and her face is really dry and chubby. She makes all sorts of stuff that looks ugly, like hand lotions and what-not. Bloody hell, I hate her. She also has an obsession with penguins, and has this stupid wind-up toy that is annoying as fuck. I really want to kick her. She's just… Eww. That's best thing I can think of to describe her.

Anyway, now I'm just going to tell you some random, general info about myself.

I like lights. I like swearing. I like potatoes. I like blueeee. I like red. I like clicking. I like taking the piss out of stuff. I used to have an obsession with fairies, but seriously who doesn't like Tinker bell? I love Tinker bell. I like pens. I like destroying things. I don't really like destroying things, but I felt like putting it there. So, I'm seriously really awkward around guys. I both talk a lot and be slightly mean and nice at the same time, or I just have to sit next to them in the stupid fucking seating plan.

_Choose your voice and etch that on your soul__  
><em>Make them heard when crowds drown out your cold<em>  
><em>Leave behind your questions, silent thoughts, and mentions<em>  
><em>The wake has so never fall to<em>  
><em>Your voice is a weapon<em>  
><em>So do with it what you can<em>_


	7. Hello, Ladies

**_Hello! I wanted to say thanks to everyone who's reading this! I'm really proud. Oh, I watched Captain America: The winter soldier. I think if Steve Rogers and Natasha Romanoff got together, I would so ship it._**

* * *

><p>Hello, ladies. And gentlemen. Of course gentlemen. I'm Jonathan Morgenstern, Soon moving, and packing at this moment in time. Yeah, it's pretty boring. Buuuuuut, I did watch Cars 2 the other day. It was good. Love Cars 2.<p>

Uhh, I'm 17, I like chocolate, movies, children's movies (Clary says I'm childish), and singing. My dad says that I should become a lawyer, because I won't earn money in singing, but I find that a load of bullshit. Clary says that he thinks singing isn't a manly job. See? Bullshit.

People think I date too many girls, and that I use them, but to be quite honest, they just ask me out. And if they look nice, I'll say yes. It's not my fault that girls throw themselves at me. Sometimes I wonder why, but Clary just says for me to look at my face. I have looked at my face. It's actually quite a nice face. Ok, I'll stop mentioning the face (it is a beautiful face).

Bluegh, I don't know what to say. I like music, think Bastille is great (Clary thinks I fan girl. pfffffftt...) and my voice is beautiful. Ok, so not really, but it's pretty good.

I'm protective of Clary. She says I'm over-protective, and that I had a death glare for Simon, but seriously, she's so _small. _She can't protect herself. *Clary shouts that she can take care of herself. She's a big girl* Suuuuuuure you can Clary. But you all agree that that is a load of crap.

When you think about it, I actually might be slightly over-protective. She isn't allowed to date until she's thirty, which is totally rational. How is this not rational? Ok, so I date a lot of girls, but I'm a guy! It's different with her. She's not allowed to get hurt. She won't be fixed if she does.

Seeing as we are on the topic of girls, I'll mention that I've dated a few people. As in, more than a few. I've honestly never had a steady relationship. It's just a foreign concept to me. If I wanted a real relationship other than my sister, I would want someone pretty. Someone with flair. Someone who can bake. I like muffins. Not a bad kisser. Not too hard to ask, right?

I'm apparently the exact opposite of Clary. See, it's kind of weird. I'm popular, she's not. I have authority, she doesn't. I can be scary, she couldn't hurt a fly. She has red hair; I have white/blonde hair. Then again, we do have some common traits. Like we both have Uhh, pale skin. Or green eyes. Or the same hands, apparently… we're very stubborn. And rebellious. They can't handle us.

So, I'm moving to England. Yeah, England. I don't really care. Maybe I'll get some friends. Obviously, it won't be hard. Look at my face. It's beautiful (I did not just mention the face). I like England. It' has some nice rain, and cold weather. My kind of weather. I like tea as well. It has occurred to me that I'm going to have an American accent in a British world, so I wonder what people will think of that. Actually, this will be hard for Clary. I did talk to her, and it went something along the lines of this…

"CLARY!"

"WHAT?"

I'm having a conversation with someone in a different room. Therefore there is the need to shout.

"WE'RE AMERICANS!"

"AND?"

"IN ENGLAND!"

"SO WHAT!"

"WE HAVE ACCENTS!"

She runs into my room.

"Shit. I did not think of this." She says.

"Well, of course I'm fine, the ladies will love me, but people might find _your_ accent weird." I tell her matter-of-factly.

"Ughh,

," she whines. "I have to socialise. In a _different _country,"

"It's gonna be so weird with everyone being all British and tea drinking."

"Yeah, it will be."

End of my amazing conversation with Clary. You know, that wasn't as amazing as it sounded in my head. England will be fine. I'll be totally fine. If worst comes to worst, I'll just stick with Clary. Yup, sounds wonderful.

Ok, I have friends, but they're all a bunch of assholes. None of them are real, and all they do is play soccer and party. Pretty stupid, huh. But, if it keeps my profiles up, then I'm all good. Alec, Clary's friend Isabelle's brother, is a pretty good friend. He's gay, though. He isn't straight, and not into girls. This is sad. He has a boyfriend in England. And some cousins. And he's going to the same 6th form school as me. In England, that is what it's called. Are you proud of me? I did research on England!

i'm actually moving. To a different country. Tomorrow. Should I be scared? Probably. Am i? Not really, in the slightest.

_ Note to self: find some proper friends in England._

I like wearing chinos, and high tops, and jumpers, and chequered shirts. Chequered shirts are what I live for. That, and chocolate.

Right, well I think I've said quite a bit now, and I'm pretty happy with that, so yeah. I think we're good.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Ok! This is really weird, because I've already written Chapter 8. I'm weird like that. <em>**


	8. Everything Has Changed

_**So, guys. That last chapter was kinda crappy. But I really didn't know what to write about Jon. Ehh, I'm good. So, I'm double updating! Eeeeeks. Never done this before. I'm pretty proud of myself. oh, there's a little bit where Jon is talking. it's in bold. Ok, well I'll leave you to your reading. Drop a review! Don't be Mean!**_

* * *

><p><em>All I knew this morning when I woke<em>  
><em>Is I know something now, know something now I didn't before.<em>  
><em>And all I've seen since eighteen hours ago<em>  
><em>Is green eyes and freckles and your smile<em>  
><em>In the back of my mind making me feel like<em>

I'm taking one last look at my bedroom. The walls are bare. There's nothing on the floor. The wardrobe is empty. It's so dead, it's kind of scary. I don't really know if I want to leave. Jon's the only solid thing right now in my life. Him and my father.

_I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now_  
><em>I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now<em>

_I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now_  
><em>I just wanna know you, know you, know you<em>

Isabelle came over in the morning, and cried her eyes out. Simon said goodbye the day before. I couldn't stand it. I really don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know England. I want to stay here in America, but I know that moving to England now will help. It will give me a fresh start, so I can figure out who I am right now.

_'Cause all I know is we said, "Hello."_  
><em>And your eyes look like coming home<em>  
><em>All I know is a simple name<em>  
><em>Everything has changed<em>  
><em>All I know is you held the door<em>  
><em>You'll be mine and I'll be yours<em>  
><em>All I know since yesterday is everything has changed<em>

Jon opens the door. His eyes are bright, the way they've always been. I hope nothing ever changes in him. He's what home is to me. He tells me that we're leaving in five minutes. He gives a small smile, and holds the door open. Then tears are rolling down my face. He looks mildly shocked, and then lets the door fall closed and approaches me slowly. He wraps his arms around me. _Promise me,_I whisper to him. _Promise me you'll always be mine._He just tightens his arms around me, and that's all the confirmation I need.

But we're still leaving.

_And all my walls stood tall painted blue_  
><em>and I'll take them down, take them down and open up the door for you<em>

**I'm actually worried about moving. I don't even know how I'm going to do this. But I still walk out of my room, towards Clary's, and push open the door.**

_And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies_  
><em>The beautiful kind, making up for lost time,<em>  
><em>Taking flight, making me feel like<em>

I'm driving to the airport. I'm feeling kind of weird now. I'm kind of excited, but still sad at the same time.

_I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now_  
><em>I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now<em>  
><em>I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now<em>  
><em>I just wanna know you, know you, know you<em>

I'm panicking. Suddenly, I think of Izzy and Simon. Did I know them enough? Should I have known them better? I want to know them better.

_'Cause all I know is we said, "Hello."_  
><em>And your eyes look like coming home<em>  
><em>All I know is a simple name<em>  
><em>Everything has changed<em>  
><em>All I know is you held the door<em>  
><em>And you'll be mine and I'll be yours<em>  
><em>All I know since yesterday is everything has changed<em>

I'm walking up the stairs for the plane. I grasp Jon's hand for support, and he pulls me up the stairs. We sit in our designated seats, I sat at the window, Dad next to me, and Jon near some randomers, but Jon swaps with Dad to sit with me. I settle down in my seat, and watch the rapidly darkening sky. I can see all the lights, bright and flashing to guide the plane. The plane lurches forward. Jon starts singing _under the sea_ from _The Little Mermaid_. Like, seriously? Now? I can't help but laugh at his idiocy. We watch movies, but then I fall asleep. When I wake up, I find Jon fiddling with his chair, clearly annoying the hell out of the woman behind him.

We get given plane food, and it was disgusting. Just, this food was not food. Eww.  
>Jon kept pressing the flight attendant button, and somehow, the woman came every time, and didn't seem annoyed once, which I found very weird. Half the time I just asked for drinks.<p>

_Come back and tell me why_  
><em>I'm feeling like I've missed you all this time, oh, oh, oh.<em>  
><em>And meet me there tonight<em>  
><em>And let me know that it's not all in my mind.<em>

I fell asleep. Jon wakes me up. Something isn't right. Then I remember. I'm in England. It isn't all in my head. I'm actually in England.

_I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now_  
><em>I just wanna know you, know you, know you<em>

In this moment, as we walk to the doors of the plane, I decide that I'm going to give England a chance. I decide that I will try to be happy here. I will be happy in England.

_All I know is we said, "Hello."_  
><em>And your eyes look like coming home<em>  
><em>All I know is a simple name<em>  
><em>Everything has changed<em>  
><em>All I know is you held the door<em>  
><em>You'll be mine and I'll be yours<em>  
><em>All I know since yesterday is everything has changed<em>

It's raining. And it's cold. So very cold. Maybe it should have occurred to me that it's winter, and I will need to wrap up, but no. Jon holds the house door open. it's a relatively small house. Honestly, so long as I have a bed, I'm fine.

_All I know is we said, "Hello."_  
><em>So dust off your highest hopes<em>  
><em>All I know is pouring rain and everything has changed<em>  
><em>All I know is a new found grace<em>  
><em>All my days I'll know your face<em>  
><em>All I know since yesterday is everything has changed<em>

Everything is changing. I can't stop it, and right now, I really don't care.

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><p><strong><em>Mixed Emotions, and I have confused the fuck out of myself, so yay. Please review!<em>**


	9. PE, And The New Neighbours

**_Hi, everybody. How's your life? This Chapter's pretty short, and there's no actual point to it, but I wanted to update. Oh, I've started Chapter 10 guys! What colour should Clary's wallpaper be? Jon's is going to be blue! Please Review!_**

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><p>Hello. So basically, we had this P.E lesson, and my Teacher, Miss. Oliviero, lost her Lanyard, which meant she couldn't get into the changing rooms. This obviously sucked for us, because it meant we couldn't get changed. Such a complete and utter piss take. Now, she was making us all look for it, and no one could seem to find it. This is pointless, was probably going through everyone's head.<p>

Now. Mina hates teachers. She hates them with an absolute _burning passion_. Like, she bitches about them all the time. Especially when they know her name. Then she flips her shit, and rants like hell. Quite a few teachers know her name, like my stupid Science teacher, Miss Bitch (Her actual name is Miss. Devine). Because she knows Mina's name she constantly asks Mina questions. It's just like, you stupid cow, there are 30 students in a class. Why can't she ask anyone else? I don't know. Like I said, she's a stupid cow.

So anyway, Mina and I were looking through all the window sills in the dance studio, and Mina _found_ the god-forsaken lanyard. And I know what you're all thinking; _whoop de fucking doo, Mina found it_! Mina did _not _see it that way. See, we gave Miss. Oliviero the card (or rather, Mina did), and do you know what she did? She gave Mina a hug. I'm serious. Teacher-Hating, P.E-Hating Mina was hugged by Miss. Oliviero. Just… Eww. Mina looked so awkward. The teacher kind of put her arms around her, and Mina just stood there, like _what the fuck_? I really felt sorry for her.

Right. Well, can you guess what Mina Did when we got out of that lesson with Miss. Oliviero? Yup, she flipped. It was one hell of a rant.

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><p>Oh yeah, I bring news. There's this house next door to ours, and it's really close, so you can literally see through the window, and they are some <em>big <em>windows. This Family of three have just moved in, and I think the kids are the ones Mina was talking about in school. Aayla and I share a room, and we have the biggest window, which happens to face the other big window in the _new _neighbour's house. This Boy seemed to live in that room. I can't see him properly, but he clearly had white-blonde hair, tall, and slim. I wonder what he was called. But yeah, anyway, there were people in that house. I'm also now wondering how old they are, but I doubt they'll be in my year. Oh well.

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><p><strong><em>Ok, Basically, Eleyna is just really random, and hasn't really got a point in the story for now. But I will need her later, so I'm setting the Uhh, I can't think of the word. I'm setting th ground layers. Yeah, I like that. The foundation! My plot is coming together in my head! Yay!<em>**

**_Also, I try to update in a week at least. I feel like updating after a week is a bit too long, but you know, Procrastinators gonna Procrastinate! And I did post two chapters last time, so yeah. _**

**_Please Review! Thank you!_**


	10. Decorating, Uniform, And Runes

**_Hi guys. You know how I said that I've started Chapter 10? Well I've finished it. See, I started it before Chapter 9, and then added it later. Ok, don't worry too much about what's happening in this chapter. _**

**_Enjoy! Please Review!_**

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><p>England. I'm in England. It's Wednesday, and I'm in England.<p>

Right. Well, I have five days to furnish my room, and then I'm off to school. I'm supposedly in Year eleven, so yeah.

I examine the room. In the past few days that we've been furnishing the house, we've had a bed put in, and a wardrobe put in. there's also shelves, and a desk. The walls of my bedroom are painted cream. I pick up one of the cardboard boxes in the corner and bring it to my bed. It says clothes on the front of it in black marker, so I decide to start pulling out the clothes. I was pretty proud when I put this box into the suitcase. I had done it in such a way, that all the clothed were folded not creased, and still on hangers. Hell yeah, I was proud.

But before I start organising my stuff, I had to do something. Pulling out my phone from my pocket, I pressed play onto my music. You can't do stuff without music. Especially tidying and organising, Trust me. I tied my hair, and then began opening my boxes.

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><p>Two days later…<p>

My room now looks like it is actually lived in. my desk is an impossible mess because I just kept piling things on top, but otherwise everything is relatively clean. I check the time. _3:15pm_. I decide to pull out my Sketchbook, which I haven't used in weeks. I grab a pencil, and flip my book open. I place then pencil on paper, and begin to draw. First, it's just a few lines. Then, I'm actually drawing.

I've missed drawing. I haven't drawn or painted or done anything remotely creative since my mother died, and if you put that into perspective, that was a _long_ time ago.

When I feel like I'm finished, I look at my drawing. I drew… I drew a rune. I don't even know how, but it was one of the runes as in my dream. It was really… elegant. It looks like a diamond, with little flicks at the top. It must be buried in my subconscious, because I didn't really mean to draw them. Oh well. I flick to a new page, and start drawing again.

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><p>An hour has passed when I next look at the clock on the screen of my phone. What to do now? I think I'll look at my uniform, and then look at Jon's new room as well. Yes. I have a uniform. Just like, why? What is the point of a uniform? It just makes everyone look the same! Jon has it easy. He's in 6th Form College, that's what it is in Britain, and gets to wear suits. Obviously, Dad found this piece of information out, and then spent the whole day shopping for new suits with Jon. The poor child practically collapsed when he walked into the house. I almost felt bad for him, but then Dad said that I have a uniform as well. My jaw must have hit the floor.<p>

So, the uniform. I pull it out of the wardrobe, and my father has been kind enough to put it in one of those clothes bags. The uniform is black. It's a shirt, trousers, blazer and tie. Like seriously, I have to wear a tie? OK. The school's logo is embroidered onto the top pocket of the blazer. Wow, this is one formal uniform. I even have to wear black shoes. Oh lord. I'm not going to be able to handle this. Who on earth came up with uniform? If they aren't already dead, I'm going to find them, and kill them. If they're already dead, I'm going to use necromancy, bring them back, and kill them again. They'll be most definitely dead by the time I'm through with them. Cue evil laugh.

At least my bag is contrasting to black. It's a pale blue, with all my doodles on the back. I see white flecks falling outside the window. It's snowing. I look outside the window, and see that the snow isn't sticking. Well, damn. That just means I won't be skipping school tomorrow. I really have to go to school in England. Hmph.

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><p>I go to Jon's room, and knock on the door. He opens the door and greets me, and the first thing that catches my eye is his window. It's massive compared to mine. That lucky bastard. I can see the next house through it, and they also have a massive window. You could see the other room from here, and from what I could see, it was a girl's bedroom. The wallpaper was floral, and pink, and I could just see a dressing table and a bed. I sit down on Jon's bed, and take in is new room. The wallpaper is plain blue. The shelves are full of random stuff, like a lava lamp. His wardrobe is a pale brown. And he also has a desk, which isn't anywhere <em>near <em>as messy as my own. The boy isn't exactly a neat freak, but Jon likes his stuff to have some form of organisation. Honestly, he's just weird like that.

I don't actually know why, but I seem to have brought my sketchbook. And it's open on the page of the rune. Jon must have looked at it, because he pulls it out of my grasp.

"Where have you seen this?" he says. He sounds slightly confused, and… shocked?

"I don't know… it just happened while I was drawing." I reply. "Have you seen it or something?" I add.

"I-I think I saw it in a dream."

He couldn't have. He couldn't have dreamed the same kind of dream I did. I decided to test my luck, and ask him what happened in this dream of his.

"It… was on you?" Jon said after some thought, and it still came out like a question. Ok, this is weird.

"Were they just floating? Before you saw me?" I say nervously. What the hell is happening?

"Yeah… How did you know?" I take a deep breath.

"I had the same dream but it was you with the runes. And then there was this voice, and it said that they were _shadow hunter runes_. Oh yeah, there was a voice."

"There was this voice in my dream too. But, it didn't say that." He paused. "It was naming the runes as I looked at them," he says. This is really weird, and starting to freak me out.

He points at the book. "That's Uhh, the _Angelic rune of power," _Jon recalls. "Clary? I don't think it's normal to be having the same dream,"

I get Jon to find some pencils, and I start drawing the different runes that I could remember. Jon uses the other pencil, and names them each time I finish one. _Clairvoyance. Soundless. Stealth. Strength. Iratze. Agility. _We kept drawing until our hands hurt. Then Jon started drawing more when I stopped. _Alliance. Amissio. Binding. Open. Equilibrium. Fearless. _The list went on. Jon's drawing wasn't half bad, seeing as he'd never actually tried drawing. We used up two pages.

I agree with Jon. This isn't normal. I don't think it's normal at all.

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><p><strong><em>Please review! Thank you all!<em>**


	11. My Stupid Alarm For School

**_Hello everyone. I'm updating again. Also, I've decided to Change something. I've discussed with some, but I'm not telling now. Enjoy reading! Leave a review!_**

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><p><em>You know how you do that really, really stupid thing and have a really loud, heavy beat, jumpy song as your alarm? I've done that, and it's fucking dumb. Every weekday, so that I wake up for school, blaring out <em>Culcha Candela, Monsta_ is my phone, charging next to my pillow. It pissed me off so much, that I actually used my common sense for once, and _changed the frickin alarm. _No freaking way, I have some form of common sense? When was this? Tell me why? Why I was not informed of this? UGH, JUST LET ME SLEEP FOR NOW, . Thank you._

Guess what? That never happened. _Ed Sheeran, I See Fire, Kygo _Remix, is my alarm. You know the remix, slightly sped up and a great bit at the start? Yeah, that. If you haven't heard it, I strongly suggest you Google it this instant, because seriously, it is totally wicked compared to the original which is just boring, so slow. The remix sounds like a _normal _speed for the song. After all this, my alarm was still annoying as fuck, because I get up as soon as the alarm goes off. So, _6:30am_ in the flipping morning, I would wake up, and turn the god-forsaken alarm _off_. Clever, I know. If I actually did that. See, the thing is, I don't turn the alarm off. I let it blare through my skull, so that's why I changed it to a softer song. So I _didn't _have a ringing skull when I got out of bed. _I See Fire_ is a nice song, but the point is that alarms suck. Because I think I was going off-topic. You know, hypothetically speaking.

Ok, so after that great speech of mine, would _anyone _like to take a guess as to what's happening right now? Yes, my stupid alarm is going off.

I roll over, and groan. I pick my phone up, and the light is blinding. So what do I do? I blindly turn the alarm off, randomly pressing to the left of my screen with my eyes shut. I finally hit the button, and feel like flinging my phone across the room. I lie there, and think about what day it is. It's Monday, so I have to get up for school… in England. Oh, crap, crap, crap. I practically leap out of the bed, pick up a towel, and go to the shower. First day at a new school, means that I have to make first impressions. I _hate _first impressions. I'm telling you, I'm going to embarrass the shit out of myself in front of some really important person. Turning the shower on, I switch the tap to the hot water, and get in. I completely scrub myself quickly, moving onto my hair. I use the shampoo, and rub it through my scalp. After rinsing out my hair, and the rest of my body, I get out of the shower, wrap the towel around my body, and brush my teeth. Heading back into my room, I look at the clock that dad put up in the hallway. _7:00 Am. _I spent half an hour in the bathroom. _Nailed it._ I walk into Jon's room, to tell him to get his ass out of bed, but it turns out he's been up for some time. He's looking at his suits. Oh damn, I feel sorry.

The good thing about a uniform is that it means you don't have to find something to wear, and make sure it's ironed, and clean. Because in our uniforms, non-iron clothes were invented. That's the only good thing. That and no-one can take the piss out of your clothes, because they're wearing the same thing.

I pull out my hair dryer and uniform, and put my uniform on my bed, and plug my hair dryer into the socket next to my bed. I get changed, making sure my shirt is tucked and my collars are down, tie my tie, and then spend the next ten minutes drying and brushing my hair. It's really frizzy now, but really thin. Once I'd finished drying it, it had become really curly, and fell to just above my waist. I shoved a black hair band to keep my hair out of my face, and then put the dryer away.

Walking down the stairs, I can hear Jon singing.

"_Take shelter, __  
>Take the pressure,<br>Do what you want tonight, it's alright,  
>If you want to get used,<br>you get used_,"

"Hi, Jon," I say,

"I made egg," he replies.

"Eggs! No wait! Jon, don't you dare-" I started.

"_Eggy, eggy, egg, egg, crack me up_!" Jon has this annoying habit of singing that when something's to do with eggs, he will sing that stupid song. He _has _to do it. It's compulsive for him. It's to the tune of _I'm a little teapot. _He's so amazingly immature; I wonder why he's the older one.

I look at Jon. He's wearing a black suit, white shirt, and his tie is just hanging around his neck because he probably doesn't know how to do it.

"Jon?" I say.

"Yeeees?" he's such an idiot.

"Do you know how to tie a tie?"I ask innocently.

"No. Shut up Clary. You know this is a sensitive topic," he says, wiping fake tears. Too late, Jon. I'm already laughing. I pull the tie from around his neck and begin to tie it, and then my father walks into the kitchen.

"Clarissa, why do you have your brother's tie around your neck?" he inquires.

"Oh, Jon doesn't know how to tie it, so I'm doing it for him." I reply easily. I loosen the tie, then take it off, and hand it to Jon. He puts it round his neck. "Ok, now pull the smaller bit-no! Not that, this bit," I say, pointing to what I mean. "To tighten it. Pull it here, to loosen it," I say exasperatedly.

"Thanks Clary. You'll have to teach me," he says. Oh, _hell _no. that would be a total fails.

"I just came down to tell you that your taxi arrives in three minutes," Dad says. What? He's still here? Awkward.

After breakfast, I grab my bag from upstairs, and then we walk out the door.

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><p>"Jon."<p>

"Clary."

"What's the school called?"

"Something,"

The car journey is quite boring after that.

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><p>We go to the '<em>visitor's entrance'<em> where we're taken to our form teachers. She says hello, and says that her name is . The other woman, who brought us, walks on with Jon, seeing as Jon isn't in the same year as me. The class is laid out in neat rows of tables of two. She sits me near the back, then hands me a timetable, an organiser… and a piece of card, with three strips. I ask the woman what it is.

"It's your uniform card. If your uniform is out of place, a teacher will take a strip off of you. If you lose all three, you receive a Head teacher's detention," she tells me. You have got to be kidding me.

"Ok, guys, you have 5 minutes before lessons," says over the chatter. I flick through the organiser, and write my name on the front. Then I look at my time table.

Week 1:

Monday: Mathematics, English, Art, Science, Geography?

My father picked geography for me?

Tuesday: Spanish, English, Mathematics, Art, Spanish.

Wednesday: P.E, Science, Mathematics, English.

Eww, first lesson P.E.

Thursday: Science, Art, Geography, P.E, Mathematics.

P.E? Twice in one week?

Friday: English, Spanish, ICT, Science, Geography.

There's too many of each lesson.

Week 2:

Omg.

Monday: English, Mathematics, Science, Geography, ICT.

How many lessons?

Tuesday: Mathematics, Spanish, English, Rs short course, Art.

What on earth do they teach in RS short course?

Wednesday: Mathematics, Spanish, Science, English.

I'm going to hate this.

Thursday: Geography, Science, P.E, Art, Mathematics.

Don't I get free periods?

Friday: General studies, English, Science, ICT, and P.E.

Ok, so what we have established from my timetable is that it was pointless, and it sucks. There's the name of the teacher and the classroom underneath each subject. There are two different rooms for maths. What the hell? Lessons start at 8:50am, Break is at 10:50am, four loud beeps, which I assume is the bell, sounds through the room. Everyone starts shuffling with their stuff towards the door and I hear people asking what week it is. Shit, what week _is _it? Someone shout that it's week two. Hmm, Week two, Monday, means I have English. That was the lesson where I had to work with Sebastian. I look down at the Timetable. Ahh, we seem to have a problem. I don't know where room 27 is. I ask the nearest teacher in the massive swarm of students, as to where the classroom is. He gives me directions, and something about it being near the music corridor, and then walks off. Huh.

I manage to find the classroom, and only a few students seem to already be there. I say hi to the teacher, and tell her that I'm new. She immediately gives me a seat, then hands me an exercise book and an anthology.

"Today we're annotating the booklet. We've already annotated two different texts in the book, but I'm sure you can catch up at home," she says. Oh god, first lesson and I already have homework. This teacher has a really annoying voice. Like, wow, seriously annoying.

The rest of the class has filled in, and I end up near the back again, but sat next to this girl. She was pretty, with brown wavy hair and blue eyes.

"Hi," I say.

"Hello," she replies. Omg, British accents. I love them. "I'm Aayla Evergreen."

"Clary Fray," I state.

"Are you American?" she asks.

"Uhh, yeah. I moved here a week ago," I pointed out.

"Is there a problem, Aayla?" the teacher questions in a mocking tone. Boy, do I hate her already.

"Why of course not miss, I would _never _trouble you that way!" Aayla retorted.

"Oh, she was just telling me which page we're on," I put in.

The teacher didn't say anything after that. She just talked on about how the writer was feeling _this_, and the writer was feeling _that_. What a load of bullshit. At the end, she gave us a few minutes to talk. Oh, how nice of her (!). Aayla tells me to show her my timetable.

"Hey, we have quite a few lessons together! Like half of them. Err; we have…" she studies the list before saying "Mathematics, English, Science, Geography, and Spanish!"

Hmm. I decide Aayla can be my new friend. The teacher takes the register, and when she calls my name, I feel really awkward, because everyone seems to be muttering and looking in my direction. I hate being awkward.

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><p>The bell goes again, and she drags me by the arm towards what I assume is maths. I look at the stairs. All hopes of living past 20 years flew out of my head. Oh, we are going to get killed. There are too many people. Eeks, I'm too short for this. i'm going to get trampled!<p>

We reach Math. Woah, that was impossible. And once again, I'm talking to the teacher, who gives me a seat and a book, telling me that his name is Mr. Garrett. I walk over to my designated seat, and see that a boy is already seated at the table. I give a small gasp. The boy was beautiful. Gold all over, and looked very nice in his uniform. His eyes were like molten gold, his hair was so blonde, it couldn't be natural, and his cheekbones were beautiful. He looks at me as I pull my chair out.

"Hi," I state, feeling nervous being near him. Not that I was going to let it show.

"I'm Jace, Jace Herondale. You're a really lucky girl if you going to be sat here next to me" he drawls. Oh, that deep voice mixed with the Britishness. It's very beautiful, other than the fact he sounds like an absolute prick.

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><p><strong><em>Now, I don't care what you say. i know the stop was abrupt, but I'm tired, and can't be bothered writing anymore. Sorry! So very tired…<em>**

**_Please review!_**


	12. Black, Gold, White

_**Sup, ma bruddahs? Oh boy, I've wanted to say that for some time. Guys, guys, guys. You know how I said I had a Spanish exam? Well, Guess what? I GOT AN A*! OH MY GOSH! Highest in my bloody class! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-**_

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><p><em>"I'm Jace, Jace Herondale. You're a really lucky girl if you going to be sat here next to me" he drawls. Oh, that deep voice mixed with the Britishness. It's very beautiful, other than the fact he sounds like an absolute prick.<em>

Well, you know how I said he's a prick? Well, he's a prick. He kept hitting on me, and quite frankly, I wasn't interested. I mean seriously, why doesn't he get the hint? He must have been confused by the rejection. According to Aayla, Jace was prone to saying dirty things. With a face like his, I really wasn't surprised. She also told me that Jace had probably slept with half the girls here. And then dated the other half. So, basically, Jace is completely off-limits, because he sounds like a dirty, heartbreaking, womanizing player. Totally off-limits. Yup, most definitely off-limits. Completely and utterly. _Riiiiiiight_.

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><p>So, two lessons down, and only three to go! I'm so proud. I stick with Aayla at break, and she introduces her friend Aline. Aline's ok, But she seems a bit…boring. Apparently, she's actually crazy. I tell Aayla and Aline that I wanted to find my brother, and they said they wanted to find their other friend, who happened to be some guy in 6th form. Maybe he'd made friends with Jon. I walk down the corridor with Aayla and Aline, listening to Aline chat about some band who is absolutely <em>so<em> Hot. Wow. She's so obsessed.

I see Jon, whose hair stands out against the suit he's wearing. He's talking to two dark-haired boys, one with spiky hair, and the other with messy hair. The spiky haired boy turns round, and I immediately recognise him.

"Magnus!" I exclaim. I didn't realise Magnus went here. Actually, Jon may or may not have mentioned this when we were moving. Meh, I couldn't remember if I tried.

"Clarissa, _darling_," he proclaims. Magnus has always been fond of endearments like that. I haven't the faintest idea why, but he does. Jon and the other boy are now looking at me, Aayla and Aline. He stretches his arms out, and I give him a hug. "How have you been, my dear?" he asks.

"Uhh, I'm good, I guess. England-" I start, but Aayla cuts me off.

"Wait, wait, wait. You know Magnus? What-how do you know him?" she says, clearly discombobulated.

"Oh, He's Jon's friend's boyfriend. The boyfriend being Magnus, and Jon's friend being Alec," I reply.

"Oh," She says.

"Speaking of Alec, does he go to this school?" I ask, directing my question at Magnus.

"Oh, no, His parents have sent him to another private school." Magnus huffs.

"Ok, we do not need to hear about my _wonderful_ cousin. I'm clearly much more important at the present time being," the Black haired boy claims. His eyes are beautiful, a dark blue, like the Caucasian sea. The boy is clearly very beautiful, with his black hair, blue eyes, and girlish features. _But not as beautiful as Jace, _I think. Wait, what?

"And you are?" I say questioningly.

"Will Herondale, Best shad- Herondale there ever will be," he says cheerfully and generally a bit over the top. "Don't tell Jace, but I'm most definitely the best looking," He adds. I laugh, and he smiles. He's cute, most definitely. "Don't get any ideas, though. I have a girlfriend and she's isn't afraid to set ducks on you," He says. The good ones are always taken. But ducks? The good looking ones always have something _weird_ as well. Ducks. Seriously?

"Ok, well _I'm_ going to make Clary sit in a café. Anybody else want to come?" Aayla says. Everyone starts saying things. I think Aayla must feel awkward, because if _my _friend saw some long lost person, I'd feel awkward too. Jon says that he wants to come, and steps towards us.

"I am?"

"Yes, you are. Now come along, child," she says, and then bursts out laughing.

"I'm so _not a child,_" I say stubbornly. She starts walking, and me and Jon follow.

"Yes, you most definitely are. You're shorter than me hon, and that's clearly saying something." Jon laughs.

"Shut up Jon."

I like Aayla. Something about her reminds me of Isabelle, but I can't remember. Oh, who cares?

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><p>The Café is packed with people. It's really busy, and the noise is outstanding. How loud do people talk? It turns out, nobody is talking that loud. There's just a hell of a load of people here. Aayla picks her way through the tables to a free one in the middle. She places her stuff down, and then looks at us.<p>

"I'm getting a drink. Have you had your biometrics done yet?" she asks.

"Uhh, no? What do we need biometrics for?" I ask.

"You know, maybe to pay for your food or something? They basically use your thumbprint so you can access your account to put money in the system to pay for food. It makes it easier for the school, because it means they don't have to deal with lots of change," she states.

That clears _everything_right up. Jon looked positively confused. Aayla just sighs and walks away, but comes back within a minute.

"Lessons are about to start. We have to leave the café. Jon and I rise, and sure enough, everyone is leaving the café. I reach into my blazer pocket, but Aayla speaks before I pull my timetable out.

"We have science. You're in my class for that lesson, remember?"

Oh, yeah. I do remember this.

"Right."

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><p>Science officially sucks. The subject? Fine. The work? Fine. The teacher? Freaking stupid. There is no point to her existence whatsoever. She is absolutely crap. She just walks back and forth, and has a hunch. She looked pissed through the whole class, and didn't explain anything. Everything was just 'you don't need to know this.' Just absolutely pointless. Aayla was also useless or this lesson, because I now sit on the other side of the classroom, so I have no one to bitch to.<p>

Geography was actually quite a nice class. The teacher was nice, the class was nice, and the work was relatively easy. There were only sixteen people in the class, so it was pretty good. The only problem was Will and Jace. Will was nice enough, and talked to me a few times, seeing as he sat at the table next to me, but he kept talking to Jace, and they kept arguing about who was more handsome. The teacher, Mr. Moir, kept trying to tell them to shut up, but they wouldn't stay quiet for more than thirty seconds. At one point, they even dragged _me_into the conversation.

Jace: "Clary, Tell Will that I'm more handsome,"

Will: "Seriously Clary, whose better looking?"

Oh, god. Why would they put me in this place? Ack, I'm gonna say Jace…

"Oh my god. Uhh, Will is better looking?" I say questioningly. Jace stares.

"Clary, I thought we were friends!" he cries. Ok, now remember maths, Clary. Remember, Jace was an ass.

"Yes but Jace, You're just… Gold. There isn't anything to describe you. You're boring," I shake my head disapprovingly. I'm enjoying this way too much. "But Will… look at him. He's got blue eyes, Black hair, pale skin… see? Sorry Jace, You're pretty, But Will is beautiful. And clearly much _nicer_," I say, twisting the word _nice_. Jace just turned around to face his work. I'm so proud of myself. That felt so good.

* * *

><p>I eat lunch with Aayla, and head towards the ICT corridor. We sit in there, on the floor, and have the weirdest conversation ever…<p>

"Your brother." Aayla said. "He's called Jon, right?"

I look at her quizzically.

"Yes…" I reply.

"He's beautiful," she blurts. Ooooooookaaaaaaaaaaaaay, was _not _expecting that.

"And he has a really beautiful voice as well," she says wistfully. I don't know what to say to this. I'm used to people complimenting Jonathan's looks and his voice, and I admit his voice is really nice, but not the way Aayla said it.

"Uhh, I really don't know what to say. You know, He's always been confused as to why people want to date him and what-not, and every time, I have told him to go look in the mirror. He doesn't believe me," I tell her. I don't even know why.

"Huh. I've always thought combinations of your eyes and hair colour is really pretty, and really rare. No one ever has red hair. Some have gingery orange air, but never bright red. I've always wanted red hair and green eyes. Or like Will. I love black hair and blue eyes, and blonde hair and green eyes. Or grey eyes. Will's cousin, Jace, he's a bit weird. He's just gold all over. You'd have to be stupid to say he wasn't attractive, but I never saw him as beautiful like Will or your brother…" She trails off. She covers her face. "I've just realised what I just said. Wow, I feel really awkward." She says. She laughs nervously.

"Yeah, that was pretty weird. Someone talking to me about my brothers looks… wow,"

Seriously weird conversation. Jon's looks, and then saying that I'm really pretty as well… Like, how did I cope through that conversation? I will never know. The question is, should I tell Jon about it? It would be funny to see Jon's reaction, but it would be mean on Aayla. I mean, I practically just met her! Ok, so it looks like I won't be telling Jon for fear of losing my new friend. Wow.

So how did I become friends with Aayla again?

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><p><strong><em>OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- <em>**

**_Please review!_**

**_OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
><em>**

**:-)**


	13. Say Hi, I Know You

_**Guys, I ship Jonabelle. Like, I don't even know, but I like the idea of it. I was reading **_**City Of Glass**_**, and that kind of happened. Also, The person who said:** I read this as soon as o got the email but i was at school and couldnt review. Anyways congrats on ur test! Loved this chapter. I think its perf. I have some ideas but i wont say them inless you ask me to. Cant wait till your next update!_ _**Who was it? I feel like it was someone who has a user! It's really annoying. If it **_**was _just a guest, then bluegh. Bluegh to you all. _**

* * *

><p>OK, so Mina and I are kind of weird I guess. See, at lunch, we sit around school in one of the corridors most of the time, saying hello to random people. Sometimes we walk round. We're usually seriously, seriously bored, so that is what we do to waste our time. Of course, today was one of those days. Sat in English, while everyone walk past, and us saying hi. Most of the people just look at us weirdly like, <em>what the fuck is wrong with you, kid, <em>some actually say hi, and some just completely ignore us, to which we shout and say, _fine, you be like that! Stupid cow. _It's pointless, and funny as hell. It made me and Mina create _The Hobo Children Authority Organisation_. I strongly suggest you try it.

Anyway, there were two boys waking past. One was Will Herondale, Friend of friend of Aayla, and the other, I didn't know. He looked familiar, with white blonde hair, tall and green eyes. He was the boy who'd moved into the house next door. Because I'm so random and crazy, I shouted,

"Hey! I know you!" he looks down at me, and stares.

"Hi Eleyna." Will says to me. I say hello back to him.

"Do _you_ know _her_?" The boy asks, confused.

"Yeah, Jon, This is Aayla's sister, Eleyna and her friend Mina." I wave, and so does Mina.

"_Anyway_, you're the boy who moved in next door," I tell him. "You have a sister, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Ok, wonderful. You can go now. I just wanted to ask," waving my hands in a shooing-away kind of motion. Will said bye and starts walking, and the boy just looks at me weirdly, before walking after Will. And then I realise. I never asked what his name was.

"Hey, Blondie!" I shout. He looks over his shoulder towards me.

"Sup?" he says. He sounds so casual.

"What's your name?" I say. He laughs.

"Jonathan Christopher." He tells me. I contemplate this, think about it, and then say,

"Alright, Johnny boy! See you around!" He mock salutes me, and then walks away, following Will.

_OK__ then, Johnny boy it is!_

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><p><em><strong>I know. This is really, really short. Please review!<strong>_


	14. I Got Changed

_**Merry Christmas, guys! I know I'm like, a day late, but I don't care. Christmas lasts for 12 days, right? And where I'm from, it's snowing! Eeeeeeeeeks! And the snow is sticking! I'd sent a picture, but you know I can't exactly do that. Boxing daaaaaaay! Yeaaaaahhh! I'm so excited, you don't even understand!**_

_**I LOVE YOU ALL! Please Review!**_

* * *

><p>There's a taxi for us outside the school. The car ride is silent. I feel awkward. But that's normal for me, right?<p>

* * *

><p>At home, Jon and I sit in the dining room.<p>

"Hi," I say.

"Hi."

"What did you do at lunch?" I say in an attempt to make conversation.

"I had the weirdest conversation with this girl, and it turns out we live next door to your new friend." He replies.

Ok, totally not a coincidence.

"Really? I had a weird conversation with Aayla as well. Like, awkward and weird at the same time," I tell him. I think that was a mistake in saying that, because it means that he will probably ask what happened in my oh-so-weird conversation. Let's hope he doesn't. So, before he can say anything, I ask:

"Ok, who did you talk to and what happened in this conversation of yours?"

"I talked to this girl, she's called Lena? Lenya? Eleyna. Her name was Eleyna. Anyway, she was like, _hey you!_ And I was walking down the English corridor with Will, you know, the black haired boy with Magnus," he paused for breath. "Will knew her, and said that she was Aayla's sister or something, and then she claimed that we lived next door, so I'm assuming that house next door, with the pink bedroom is her house," Jon tells me. _That, _I think, _is a hell of a lot to take in_.

"So what was your conversation like?" he says. Ah, crap. Why, Jon. Why? Why would you ask me such a question?

"Well?" I just stare at him for a bit.

"Umm, it was weird?" I say. Oh, real clever fray (!)

"No shit, Sherlock," He says sarcastically. "We've already established that. What did you talk about to make the conversation so weird and who did you have this glorious conversation with?" I'm contemplating lying to him, but I'm a really bad liar, so I don't think I could pass it off as the truth. Why is my life so hard? _Tell me why… (__**Why I cry, hurts inside, I can't lie...**__)_

"It was with Aayla, and we were talking about…"

"You were talking about…"

"She was talking about our looks," I say finally. He raises an eyebrow. Oh my god, don't even do that. _I can't freaking do that._

"She was saying how rare the combinations were of our eyes and hair, and she was telling me that I was really pretty and how she'd always wanted to have red hair, blah, blah, blah…" I trail off.

"That was most definitely _not _as weird as you made it out to be." He says.

"No… But it was awkward as shit," I say.

"Sure it was Clary. Sure it was." He says back. "Anyway, I'm gonna go get changed. I cannot bear to stay in this suit any longer."

"Okey dokey, Jon,"

Jon walks out of the Dining room, and up the stairs. I pull out my phone from one of the inside pockets of my blazer and then check the time on my phone. _3:30pm. _I lift up my bag from the dining floor, and head in the direction of the stairs.

* * *

><p>When I'm in my room, I throw my pyjama's on, because let's face it, I'm not going anywhere today. I decide that I want to talk to Isabelle, and I head out of my room, to grab my father's laptop from his room. Then it occurs to me that he probably took it to work, and won't be back until another hour. Well, I don't think I'm talking to Izzy any time soon. I go back to my room, and instead pick up my brush. My hairbrush, mind you because I want to brush my hair, not paint.<p>

I start at the bottom and work all the knots out of my hair. I gather all my hair together, push it to the side, and start plaiting it, tying it up at the bottom with a bobble. Then I pull the bobble out, and re-brush my hair. You cannot judge me for being bored. Jon walks into the room, ten minutes later, without knocking on the door. Assholes these days. Honestly, I thought they invented respect for people.

"Hi! You know people invented knocking for a reason?" he just shrugs at me.

"You know you love me. Magnus has decided that he's inviting people over. I think he's bringing Will, Jace, Alec, Aayla, Her brother Luke, And Will's sister. Oh, and Alec's other cousins. God knows what their names are," he says nonchalantly. You have got to be kidding me.

"WHAT?! ARE THEY COMING HERE? ARE YOU CRAZY? I KNOW NONE OF THESE PEOPLE! Except for Magnus and Alec and Will. AND JACE IS COMING? BUT I HATE HIS GUTS!" I shout.

"Woah, Clary, calm down! And why do you hate Jace? Did he do anything?" Jon questions. Ahh, Shittacki Mushrooms.

"Nothing I- he did nothing," I say finally. "Ok, why did you invite people over for? I'm in pyjamas! Do you see my PJ's?" I whine, gesturing to my pyjamas.

"Well of course I did. They're kind of hard to miss."

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. My PJs are bright yellow. Leave me alone, don't you dare be judging. I needed more colour in my life.

"I suggest you put some real clothes on. There are people, which means you do not want to be seen in PJs. OK?" he asks.

In the end, I shoo him out of my bedroom to put some 'real' clothes on, and tie my hair up in a messy ponytail. I get out of my bedroom, and check that downstairs is tidy, because honestly, it's just embarrassing if someone visits and your house is a mess. Like, the shame would be so bad, I would never show my face to the world ever again.

Then people knock on the door. Ok, and now I'm really panicking. Like, I don't even know half these people. I'm going to murder Jon some day. He won't live to see the day.

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><p><em><strong>I ACTUALLY HAD INITIALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ON CHRISTMAS, BUT I FORGOT. OH WELL. <strong>_


	15. People In The House

_**Happy New Year guys! I was gonna update earlier, but I really couldn't be bothered, and I was playing Viking Defence. So, this chapter isn't as detailed as it could have been, but its new year, and I was still up at 4:00am dancing with my aunt. She's practically my sister. Maybe I'll edit the chapter later, and add a bit more, but right now, screw it all.**_

_**Anyway, Thanks to everyone who's reading! Please Review!**_

* * *

><p>So this is awkward. We're sat on the floor of the lounge, in a small circle, and as per usual, I am feeling awkward. Like, I swear the awkwardness is rolling off of me.<p>

We've shoved the coffee table into corner, and everyone's drinks are on it. Well, seeing as I know no-one here except Magnus, Alec, Will, and kind of Aayla and Jace (But I really hate Jace right now, so he doesn't count), I immediately say that we have to have introductions.

Ok, so, Magnus goes first, Flamboyant as always.

"Magnus Bane, College, but I'm probably actually way older than you lot. I've seen centuries of history! I'm a Glitter Extremist. Oh, and I have a cat. He's called Chairman Meow." Then he pokes Alec.

"Hey! Oh. I _hate_ introductions," He says exasperatedly. Magnus pokes him again.

"His name is Alec Lightwood. God knows why I'm dating him," Magnus says for him. Jace is sat next to him, so he speaks next.

"Jace Herondale. Pleasure to meet you all." Oh, sure, play nice at my house. I really love his voice. _Oh my god. What the hell am I saying?_

There's Aayla and her brother Luke, who practically look like twins, with brown hair and blue eyes. Will says his name, introduces his sister Cecily for her, and she punches him, and then she introduces herself. Wow, that is a beautiful relationship. They also look practically exactly the same, Black hair and blue eyes. After them, Jon says his name, says my name, and then looks at me as if anticipating whether I'm going to punch him or not. So I slap him upside the head.

"Ow!"

Well, that was fun. But I won't say that my hand is now stinging.

"Ok people, Since Magnus decided he owns the place and has invited people to my house, what shall we do?" because I have no idea what to do. But obviously I don't say that either.

"Prank calls," Jace states. There's a chorus of agreement.

"Fine. Who can we call?" I say.

"We could call my sister. She's probably bored out of her brains anyway," Aayla says. She pulls out her phone. "I've got minutes. Let me just privatise my number…"

"So who wants to talk?" Jon can speak?

"Me and her can't speak," Luke says, gesturing to himself and Aayla,"And Magnus, Cecily, and Will can't speak, or Jace either. She knows our voices,"

Oh yeah. That leaves me and Jon. Oh, how wonderful.

"Ok! Here's her number. Let me put it on loud speaker."

The dial tone goes, and we wait for Eleyna to pick up the phone. On the third ring, she answers.

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this sir, Madam, or Ma'am?" I say. Jace and the others start to snigger. I really feel like telling them to shut up.

"Umm, I'm sorry, I think you got the wrong number-"

"No we don't! This is the _Random Number Draw, _and you've just won £1000!" Jon quickly says.

"Oh, Sure I have Jonny boy. You haven't disguised your voice very well, have you? And I'm gonna assume that that was your sister, wasn't it?" She replies. _What the fuck_? I look at Jon, who looks mildly shocked. _Jonny boy_?

"No no, you've actually won £1000!" I try.

"I'm not stupid. You've privatised the number. It makes one assume that something isn't right. And I can hear everyone in the background laughing, so clearly this was a crappy prank call. Oh, and tell Aayla she's in trouble. She has a detention in Maths," Eleyna says. Damn that girl is good. Aayla just puts her face in her hands.

"Thanks for wasting my time! Bye!" and she just cuts the call.

The clock on Aayla's phone says 4:53pm. I look at Jon in alarm.

"_Father is going to be home any second now!" _

"_CRAPSHITFUCK!" _

Now, we didn't say any of this. It was kind of _look at me in the eye and hope to god you fucking understand_.

"Ok, sorry guys, but let's uhh, take the party to Aayla's house," Jon says. He claps his hands and everybody starts to move. Oh good, he understood.

"Wait, What? Why are we _moving_ to my house?" Aayla cries.

"Because my father is going to be home soon, and we haven't told him that we were having people over!" Jon says. Of course, she wouldn't understand.

"Eww, _Father_. How _formal_." Aayla replies. I've opened the front door for people, and everyone is shuffling out.

"Has anyone ever told you that _you_ speak posh?" I retort.

"Well of course they have. I already know that I speak posh. I take pride in it," She tells me.

Once everybody is finally out the door, I grab a jacket, and follow suit.

* * *

><p>Once again, we're sat in a lounge. But we're sat on sofas this time. Against three of the walls in the room, there are two sofas and a chair against one wall. In front of the sofa in the middle, there's a bench in front, and coffee table in front of that. We all sat on the sofas and Aayla sat in the chair.<p>

And then music starts blasting.

"I'm going to kill Eleyna," Aayla mutters. She stalks out of the room, and you could hear her walking up the stairs. Thirty seconds later, she comes running back in, and flops on the chair.

"She threw a book at my head!" She practically shouted. "She isn't going to turn the music down either," she adds. Well, I think I've heard this song before.

"I like this song," Jon muses. "It's _Years & Years_."

"OK, well, can we play truth or dare now?" Magnus says. Oh hell no.

"I hate this game." I'm serious. I can't think of anything to say, and I don't like doing the dares.

"Then you can go first." He replies. Oh you have to be kidding me.

"But- Fine. Whatever. Magnus, Truth or Dare?" I say. Ok, Clary, Think about what you could say.

"Dare."

"I dare you to uhh, swap clothes with Alec,"

"That isn't really the hardest you could think of," He stood up, poked Alec, and then walked out. When they came back, they had swapped clothes. Alec was now in bright fancy clothes, and Magnus was in a plain jumper and Jeans.

"Oh my god."

That is amazing. Alec looks a bit grumpy, But Magnus seems indifferent. I think it's just because their dating.

Once they'd sat back down, Magnus spoke.

"OK, Aayla, Truth or Dare?"

"Why would you do such a thing? I don't know… dare," She says.

"Go dance round the street lamp outside to All about that bass,"

"Magnus?"

"Yes?"

"I really hate you."

"That's nice hon. you have to sing the song too." He adds as an afterthought. Outside? Eww.

"Can I pick the song then? I hate Meghan Trainor," she asks. That is a fair point. Meghan Trainor is so annoying. And she seems to have something against skinny girls. Naturally, I take offence because I am a very skinny girl.

"Fine."

* * *

><p>Aayla goes to get her sister's laptop, and we all wait outside. And it's really cold out here. Oh my god. I'm cold. So very cold. Downside's of being skinny. Aayla walks out with a purple laptop and a little girl a few inches shorter behind her.<p>

"So I just have to sing a song and dance to it. In front of all you horrible people," Aayla says.

"I am not horrible! I'm a nice guy!" Jace claims. Oh yeah, you are totally a nice guy.

"Jace, when a guy says that they're a nice guy, it usually means they're an absolute asshole,"

"Oh just hurry up," I say exasperatedly. "I'm cold!"

"Fine! Eleyna, play the music!" Aayla says.

It's the same song that Eleyna was playing before.

"_I must be tough  
>I must behave, I must keep fighting<br>Don't give it up  
>I want to keep us compromising<em>

_Open your arms and pray_  
><em>To the truth that you're denying<em>  
><em>Give in to the game<em>  
><em>To the sense that you've been hiding<em>

_Where are you taking me?_  
><em>I can't be blamed<em>  
><em>I want you to want me again<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>Cause your love only gets me abused<em>

_Give me that rush_  
><em>I want to show you what you've been missing<em>  
><em>Am I enough<em>  
><em>To keep your other lovers hidden<em>

_Where are you taking me?_  
><em>I can't be blamed<em>  
><em>I want you to want me again<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>Cause your love only gets me abused<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>I wanna see what you're willing to lose<em>

_You know that you've got me_  
><em>You've locked me down<em>  
><em>You tell me you want me<em>  
><em>You need it now<em>  
><em>You know that you've got me<em>  
><em>You've locked me down<em>  
><em>You tell me you want me now<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>Cause your love only gets me abused<em>

_Is it desire?_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you?<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>I wanna see what you're willing to lose<em>,"

I stare at Aayla. She's dancing slowly, and seems kind of nervous. She's singing as well. I'd be nervous too, If I was dancing front of a load of people.

I look at her sister, Eleyna. Her eyes look really big in the darkness. She's singing to the song as well. I glance back at Aayla, but it looks like she isn't actually singing. Was she- Was she miming the words? Then it occurs to me. The singing was coming from Eleyna's direction; So Aayla wasn't the one singing. Eleyna was.

_What a sneak_.

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><p><em><strong>Guys, I have nothing against Meghan Trainor, my cousin said that kind of thing, and I figured that Clary wouldn't like her. <strong>_

_**Also, I am in love with Years & Years. Olly Alexander is so cute! But I think he's gay. **_

_**Pleas review! Smiley Face! Imagine that is a smiley face, because if I do a smiley, it gets turned into the letter J. I don't know. **_


	16. You Should Understand

**_Heeeeeeeeey guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuys. So I know this Chapter is really late, but life got in the way._**

* * *

><p><em>No one gets it. They never understand. I thought if one is older they should have been through it all. They should have already known everything about ones that are younger. But no, they don't get it. They should understand. They should be able to understand. You should understand.<em>

_They never care about me. 16, 17, no-one cares about that little girl who craves her family's attention so much it hurts. But she never gets it. It's always, oh, Aayla you're so blah blah! Luke, you're doing so Bluegh! I don't care about their achievements! I want people to see me! I'm the smartest in my math's class, they never notice. I do well in all my subjects, nobody notices. I'm on the track for A-fucking-stars! Do they see me? No. They can't see me. And they never will._

* * *

><p>I'm sat in my room. I'm annoyed at the world, and I want everyone to burn. Everyone will burn. The idea of me burning down the world has been in my head for a while now. I know I'd never have the guts to harm anyone. But I wish I could. I wish had no emotion, but that wasn't going to happen either.<p>

I'm blasting music in here. I can hear people walking into the house, but I can't bring myself to care. I really want to scream to the world that I don't care. I really can't handle anything right now.

I'm trying to do a speech for English, but I can't think of what I'm passionate about. Ugh, everything sucks in my life.

_I must be tough__  
><em>I must behave, I must keep fighting<em>  
><em>Don't give it up<em>  
><em>I want to keep us compromising<em>_

_Open your arms and pray_  
><em>To the truth that you're denying<em>  
><em>Give in to the game<em>  
><em>To the sense that you've been hiding<em>

And then Aayla walks into the room. Here I am, wallowing in my self-pity and unhappiness, and Aayla just walks into the room like she owns the goddamn world.

"Turn the music down!" She says loudly. Oh fuck off Aayla; I don't want to talk to you. You don't even see how lucky you are, with your ability to make friends so easily. You have so many, and their all cool people, their all really pretty. It's just such a piss-take that I'm an unsociable little pessimist.

I don't give a shit if she wants me to turn the music down. I pick up my English book, and throw it as hard as I can, in a fit of rage, at her face. She cries out, and slams the door. I can hear her storming down the stairs.

Oh shit. I didn't mean to throw the book. Aayla's going to hate me now. I put my head on the desk. I'm so stupid. I just mess everything up. Why couldn't I be more like Aayla and Luke?

_Maybe you aren't related to them. Maybe you're adopted_. I laugh at my own ridiculous thinking. Ridiculous of course, But I can still feel the doubt creeping into my mind.

* * *

><p>Aayla walks back in. I'm sat reading a book, because I can't concentrate enough to do my homework. I've gone and scrapped it. Who gives a crap if I get a detention? No-one will.<p>

"Are you going to throw another book at my head?"

I lose track of my thoughts.

"What? –no. sorry," I say.

"Fine. I need you to do me a favour." Uh-oh.

"What do you want me to do?"

"You know how I can't sing?" she says. Oh yes, most definitely. Aayla tries to sing, and her voice breaks. She's absolutely terrible. But she still sings.

"I need you to sing for me." Wait, wait, wait.

"What?" I say incredulously. She wants me to sing?

"Yeah, basically, my friends have dared me to sing and dance, and I can't sing, so…" she trailed off.

"Fine."

"Really?" she says excitedly. "Bring your laptop!"

What have I just got myself into?

* * *

><p>Thirty seconds later, I'm wrapped in a woolen cardigan and following Aayla out the door.<p>

"So I just have to sing a song and dance to it. In front of all you horrible people," Aayla says.

I'm not really listening to what they say.

"I am not horrible! I'm a nice guy!" Jace claims.

"Jace, when a guy says that they're a nice guy, it usually means they're an absolute asshole,"

"Oh just hurry up," this red haired girl says exasperatedly. "I'm cold!"

"Fine! Eleyna, play the music!" Aayla says. What, me? Oh yeah.

"_I must be tough__  
><em>I must behave, I must keep fighting<em>  
><em>Don't give it up<em>  
><em>I want to keep us compromising<em>_

_Open your arms and pray_  
><em>To the truth that you're denying<em>  
><em>Give in to the game<em>  
><em>To the sense that you've been hiding<em>

_Where are you taking me?_  
><em>I can't be blamed<em>  
><em>I want you to want me again<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>Cause your love only gets me abused<em>

_Give me that rush_  
><em>I want to show you what you've been missing<em>  
><em>Am I enough<em>  
><em>To keep your other lovers hidden<em>

_Where are you taking me?_  
><em>I can't be blamed<em>  
><em>I want you to want me again<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>Cause your love only gets me abused<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>I wanna see what you're willing to lose<em>

_You know that you've got me_  
><em>You've locked me down<em>  
><em>You tell me you want me<em>  
><em>You need it now<em>  
><em>You know that you've got me<em>  
><em>You've locked me down<em>  
><em>You tell me you want me now<em>

_Is it desire_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>Cause your love only gets me abused<em>

_Is it desire?_  
><em>Or is it love that I'm feeling for you?<em>  
><em>I want desire<em>  
><em>I wanna see what you're willing to lose,"<em>

_The red haired girl is staring at me. Her brother is also staring at me, but I don't think Aayla noticed. And then I remember. I'm the one singing. Well they __are__ observant. Aayla's __so__ screwed. _

_Oh well._

* * *

><p><em><strong>Meh, I had my first week of school, so I warn you to expect updates to be slower. And now it is 11:56, so I'm gonna go eat breakfast. <strong>_


	17. Guests and Co-Workers

**_Helloooo! It snowed where I am, so that's exciting. My cousins have made a snowman. _**

**_I have a new Beta! So Exciting! Thanks to Arelia Miles! She's started Beta'ing my story! I'm really happy about that. _**

**_Well, yeah. I'm a happy person right now._**

* * *

><p>Guests: they suck. Social gatherings: they <em>also<em> suck.

When your dad is hosting a party for all his new co-workers, you have to dress fancy, and look presentable. I don't understand why they couldn't just have a pyjama party. That would have been awesome. I actually do know why I can't be in pyjamas. It has to be formal. With formal people, and formal clothes.

So here I am, at the back of the room, in a in a formal flowery top and blazer, and skinny jeans. It works out amazingly well, because the skinny jeans don't look informal. I'm quite proud that I managed to pull the look off.

Jon, the lucky little shit, has it easy. He just put one of those fancy suits on that dad bought him. He's wearing a blue suit, with a white shirt. He looks really tall, and really skinny. Like I said, the lucky little shit. He _does_ look really good though.

* * *

><p>All through the evening, I've been drifting aimlessly through people. But now I can see one of the workers coming towards me.<p>

Shit.

That's _never_ a good sign. So I swiftly turn round and walk to the coffee table, where an assortment of drinks has been placed. I pick up a fancy looking glass filled with lemonade, and then casually sip my drink, subtly trying to ward everyone away from me because I don't feel like being social.

But obviously that doesn't happen, because I am me and nothing ever seems to go right. A man walks up to me. It's the same one as before.

"Hello," he says, as if expecting me to respond and start a conversation. I ignore him, and carry on drinking slowly. God, this is awfully boring.

"Are you one of Mr. Morgenstern's co-workers? You look very young," he says cheerfully. I almost spit my drink out.

Eww. Old, fat man telling me I look young? Not creepy at all.

"God, no. I'm his daughter," I say in barely disguised boredom and dislike. What? I don't want to talk to a creepy man.

"Oh, I've spoke to your brother! Lovely boy, he is, lovely boy…" He says. Oh my God. Please leave me alone. _Creepy motherfucker_.

"Wonderful. I think I might go look for him now." And then I promptly walked away, not having a clue as to where Jon was.

* * *

><p>Half an hour later, everyone is gone. Jon and I are sat at the dining table, exhausted. Since when was socializing so tiring? Then again, when you're socializing with people who are at least fifteen years older than you... Bluegh. It <em>is<em> effort.

"So there was this guy," Jon states.

"That's nice," I say.

"His name was Aldertree. Short, fat. Ugly face..."

"Yeah, I get the point."

"Did he come and talk to you? He came to talk to me. Ugh. Wanted to know as much as he could about me."  
>I was going to reply, but then my dad walked in... With a woman.<p>

"Jonathan, Clarissa, I want you to meet Cruella," he says.  
>"Hi," Jon says. She smiles at him.<p>

I say hi as well, but when she smiles at me, it's different. The smile doesn't reach her eyes. The dislike must be mutual then, because I don't like her.

"Hello," she says coolly. She sounds like one of those people who can scare the shit out of you and still remain calm throughout. She's a regal looking woman, with blonde hair, and green eyes. I don't know who she is, but I really do not like her.

"Cruella and I are actually co-workers. We work in the same department." My father says.

After a few minutes, Dad decides to see Cruella out. He walks back in to the dining room, and I blurted:

"Are you and Cruella dating?" I have no idea as to _what_ just came over me.

Jon looks at me strangely, but I keep staring at the wall next to dad. But now I think about it, it does seem possible. We've been here for over a week, why the hell shouldn't he get a girlfriend?

_Because he's too old, and he's supposed to love your mother_, a voice in the back of my head says.

He says nothing.

Oh my god. _Oh my god_. He's dating another woman. _He's dating another goddamn woman_. Oh my _god_.

I push myself out of the chair abruptly, scraping it across the floor, and walk out of the room.

* * *

><p>I change into my pyjamas. He's dating someone. <em>Oh my god<em>. Maybe I'm freaking out_. Am I freaking out_?

I drag the covers of my bed onto me, and fist my hands into the blankets. I shut my eyes tight. But nothing happens. I don't know what I expected to happen. Was I waiting for some _magical_ faerie to appear?

I get out of bed, and pick up my earphones from my desk. I plug it into my phone, get back into bed, and play music.

_Can we pretend that airplanes  
>In the night sky are like shooting stars?<br>I could really use a wish right now  
>Wish right now<br>Wish right now  
>Can we pretend that airplanes<br>in the night sky  
>Are like shooting stars?<br>I could really use a wish right now  
>Wish right now<br>Wish right now_

_Yeah, I could use a dream or a genie or a wish  
>To go back to a place much simpler than this<br>'Cause after all the partyin' and smashin' and crashin'  
>And all the glitz and the glam and the fashion<br>And all the pandemonium and all the madness  
>There comes a time where you fade to the blackness<br>And when you starin' at that phone in your lap  
>And you're hopin' but them people never call you back<br>But that's just how the story unfolds  
>You get another hand soon after you fold<br>And when your plans unravel in the sand  
>What would you wish for if you had one chance?<br>So airplane, airplane, sorry I'm late  
>I'm on my way so don't close that gate<br>If I don't make that then I'll switch my flight  
>And I'll be right back at it by the end of the night<em>

* * *

><p>I must fall asleep at some point. And when I wake up, I know why I was freaked.<p>

Because I felt hurt. I was hurt because he was already moving on. I was hurt because he was trying to move on, and I just couldn't.

* * *

><p><strong><em>So excited! Please review! <em>**

**_Thanks everyone! _**


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